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MARJANI YOU BETTER HAVE A DAMN GOOD EXCUSE FOR NOT TELLING ME THAT YOU AND ROBERT ARE A THING NOW
LANA I'm sorry Marj 😭 I wanted to tell you but I've been so busy
MARJANI I saw the article on E!news this morning, of all places I LITERALLY FELL OFF MY CHAIR Victor thought I was having a stroke
LANA Gosh that article was so fucked up They took photos of us on my own front yard Marjani. Like I can't even have privacy in MY OWN HOUSE now Thank God they didn't catch Robert's face It would've been such a mess
MARJANI Ok but HOW did that happen Not that I'm surprised ofc But last I heard you guys weren't even speaking And next thing I know I find pictures of you kissing in the tabloids???
LANA Ugggh where do I start Long story short, he messaged me after my interview came out. He said he watched it and that he wasn't mad anymore Then he basically asked if I meant what I said in my previous message
MARJANI When you said you loved him?
LANA Yep So I said I meant it, obviously And he said he felt the same way
MARJANI OHHH MA GAAAAAAAWWWWD
LANA And that's basically it ☺️
MARJANI So you managed to get over your irrational prejudice against him and his addiction?
LANA Mmmmmmh yeah let's never mention that ever again pls I was such an idiot
MARJANI Lmao yeah you were But fuck this is finally happening I'm so happy for you 😭 MY OTP IS ALIVE AND KICKING
LANA Marj he is so wonderful What did I ever do to deserve him?
MARJANI Are you kidding? He's the one who should get the pep talk I'll kick his ass if he's anything BUT wonderful
LANA Great, make him run for his life before we've crossed a week of this relationship
MARJANI Dude what week? You guys have been acting like you were in a relationship since December at least
LANA Hahahah gotta admit we may as well have been dating this entire year
MARJANI Ok now that you're happy and shit I can finally tell you
LANA Tell me what?
MARJANI I TOLD YOU SOOOOOOO
LANA Ah I knew this was coming 😂
MARJANI Literally been telling you FOR MONTHS that he has feelings for you And I've been calling you out on your denial for even longer than that
LANA They should make a public holiday in your honor
MARJANI Damn straight Oh this reminds me When are we scheduling a double date? You, me, Robert and Victor. It's gonna be epic
LANA Gosh woman will you calm down 😂 We are taking it slow
MARJANI Holy shit, it took you guys a century to get together. At this rate we'll all be in retirement homes by the time you finally agree to be seen in public
LANA Mate we've been together for A WEEK You are getting waaay ahead of yourself Like we've been friends for so long, it takes some time getting used to being more than that
MARJANI Okkk I get it You don't want to break the honeymoon phase I'm guessing the sex must be out of this world 😉
LANA OH MY FSJFFFGODFD MARJANI WHAT THE FUCK
MARJANI Stfu you're too old to act all shocked Nolan wasn't conceived via artificial insemination last I checked And you haven't been with anyone since Chase So live your best life sis 😉
LANA Bloody hell I'm going to pretend you did not just say that..... but yes, it's been pretty amazing
