Writer Games | Death Wish & 51

Task Eight: Ever After /F - Epona Jericho [3]

It was still rare to see a careful smile grace the face of Epona Jericho.

Since leaving the arena,  the expression of happiness had definitely been a more common  occurrence but she saved it for when she truly felt it was deserved.  Epona found herself smiling every single morning, just in the honor of  having woken up to see another dawn. Then, when she saw Isla curled up  at the very foot of her bed, Epona could not help but smile a little  wider.

If someone had walked  into the room that morning, they could easily have seen what level of  joy the growing wolf pup gave the quiet girl. They would not have to  confiscate the wolf or put it down; Isla was safe in a world without the  District fences. Knowing that her beloved pup was no longer illegal,  Epona could not help but reach out to pet her soft ears. Isla's tail  twitched in response.

This was it: everything Epona had fought for.

Every night, Epona still  suffered the few nightmares that she had experienced within the arena.  Her fears had been right; the guilt never truly left your system once  you had killed someone and, although she could smile when the sun shone  brightly, the moon still taunted her with memories. However, she was  certain that everything had been worth it. Every ounce of  doubt and  fear that had ever crossed her mind had not proven to be a weakness and  now, Isla was hers.

Hardly anything else was  different. Unlike the hallucination that the Game-Makers had tortured  her with, the natural world had not overtaken the District in a matter  of a few hours. As soon as Epona was released from the celebrations by  her escort, she had rushed to the meadow and found the border in the  grass where the fence had once been. Isla had been waiting in the thick  grove of trees, rushing forward and pining for Epona the moment she saw  her.

The wolf pup had not  forgotten her master. She slept in her room every night, watching and  making sure that Epona did not leave again, but nothing else seemed to  have change. The plants and foliage stayed in the forest, only growing a  little further into the meadow. The animals refused to stray from their  own hunting grounds, not tempted by the people that resided in District  Two. Occasionally, a lynx would wander a little further in but it would  not threaten anyone and everyone else would leave it alone.

That was all Epona  wanted. As long as she had Isla and the other animals were free, she did  not want to coax anyone else closer. Her wish had not resulted in  anything too harsh or too extreme; it was neutral, and that was  perfectly fine for Epona.

She cared for Isla more  than she cared for anyone else. Epona would never let anyone even touch  the wolf that she gave a hug every single morning. Hurting an animal, or  allowing anyone else to hurt them, was just not in Epona's nature.

She could kill a child.

Still scratching Isla  behind the ears, Epona tried to push the thought from her mind. She had  fought her hardest to save her wolf, ignoring the lives that she was  taken of living, breathing, innocent people. Every single victor lived  through that sort of pain and guilt, always seeing the faces of those  they had defeated in order to claim their crown. Those memories were the  price that Epona was paying to see the fence removed around the  District, not the uprising of unstoppable nature.

Which one did she  prefer? Epona would rather have tried to survive in a District overtaken  by murderous predators rather than attempt to forget the feelings  caused by being a predator herself.  She had always known that no amount  of training could prepare her for being a murderer and, although she  knew how to cope, it just did not seem as if it would ever get any  better.

Sighing, Epona finally  dragged herself from her bed. Her new house in Victor's Village was  hardly any different to her childhood home, but it was slightly bigger  and allowed her to finally be by herself. She was able to shut out  anyone who had once said anything to her, saying that she would never be  good enough. Epona had managed to prove to them that she truly was the  best, and yet she still was not happy. She could only be happier if she  was allowed to forget as well as keep the benefits.

Epona knew that forgetting would not be allowed, but she could cope.

Her training may not  have taught her how to deal with death, but it taught her how to cope  with everything. She could take a deep breath, attempt to force the  memories from her mind in order to focus on something far more positive,  usually Isla. Epona knew that she was not weak, even if she ever  allowed herself to cry.

Fixing a smile on her  face as a distraction, Epona pulled some clothes over her head and  opened the door to the rest of her house. Isla loyally followed her,  staying at her master's feet as she moved around the house and got ready  to go outside. Epona liked being alone but she refused to stay locked  up inside. She still loved her District even if she hated the people  and, even on the days where she felt her worst, she forced herself into  the sunlight in order to take a quick trip to the meadow.

She would always take  Isla with her, allowing her to exert her natural hunting energy in the  wide open space now that the wild animal allowed herself to live within  the confines of a house. With no fence to block her, Isla could wander  as far into the trees as she wanted, returning to the home she had left  behind to be Epona.

Epona herself wrapped  her arms around her in the wind, a soft smile appearing on her face as  she watched her best friend explore the world she had come from. That  was all Epona had wanted when she first volunteered for the Games: not  the victory, not the opportunity to kill but the chance to be with her  best friend without the threat of her being in danger.

Epona did not know if  she would ever be truly happy again, even with the wind blowing her hair  from her face to the accompaniment of Isla's contented howls. She had  always prided herself on the thought that guilt would never affect her  but she knew that it would never leave her alone. However, she also did  not know if she had ever experienced true happiness before the Games.  She had been raised inside of a training centre, always promising  herself that she could, one day, be the best. She was finally free from  that lifestyle, free to be with her wolf.

No - she was not happy, but Epona Jericho was content.