affinity

48. he heard the bells

Stuart's P.O.V

"I can't believe she did that. She actually did that." I say, baffled as I stare at the cut out buckles which Stella tossed to the back of the Jeep before she left. Jordan chuckles as he plays around with the buckles, bouncing it on his palm.

"She's got some nerve, huh?"

"Are you kidding? She cut the buckles out of my Jeep! I can't even drive it around without fixing it. Great, there's more stuff to worry about." I grab my roll of duct tape from the garage.

Jordan glances at the roll of duct tape, raising an eyebrow. "You think duct tape is going to fix it?"

"It fixed the engine." I reply as I start to unravel the tape to a suitable size to fix this damage.

"What will your dad say when he sees this?"

"Let's hope he never sees it. It's worse that Stella almost made it sound like we kidnapped her." I begin to put duct tape on the buckles.

"You should probably buy new buckles." Jordan says shortly as I look up to narrow my eyes at him.

"I have no other choice but to fix it."

"Hey, if you don't mind me asking-" He stops to wait for me and I hum in response, "what's with this weird hate relationship between you and Stella?"

I stop what I'm doing and think for a moment. It was more hate than anything else really, ever since the first time I spend with her in the guidance counselor's room. She was probably only nice to me for like 5 minutes before she found out she was going to have to spend more time in the guidance room.

It all started with the guidance room anyways, and it's been like that ever since.

I still don't understand why but I've gotten used to it somehow.

"I don't know." Is all I say and Jordan nods his head, not asking any further.

"She's different with you, isn't she?" I ask as Jordan blinks quickly, shaking his head with a  chuckle. 

His hand goes up to brush his nape and sighs, "Not really, I guess? She threatens me sometimes too especially when I annoy her and mess her hair. I just don't take her threatening seriously because she's so small but after today...."

"You're scared of her?" I ask in surprise.

Jordan was not the person I expected to be scared of a girl, especially since so many run after him. I can't help but laugh as Jordan rolls his eyes.

"I'm not scared of her. I just think that she might end up doing something that I least expect. Like cutting the buckles out of the seat belts. She's very intriguing, I must say." Jordan says as I continue with my tape job.

"Have fun spending time with her. I've done it many times and it was a mess." I remember the times in the guidance room.

"You guys have something different. You guys just hated the fact you had to know each other because you were kind of forced to. Whereas, in my place...I want to spend more time with her. That doesn't sound strange, right?" Jordan asks, looking at me.

Now I wonder if Jordan really does like Stella. They spend the last few days in camp together, ever since he got injured. Was he possibly considering to have a chance with Stella? Would she allow him to?

I remember Jennie's words in my head and I know that there's no way I can tell Stella how I feel knowing that Jordan might be catching some feels. I can see the way his eyes shine whenever Stella talks, the way he makes fun of her and how he seems so interested in her. He hasn't been like this since his last girlfriend. The girl who he actually loved.

Was Jordan finally finding his way back?

"Stuart?"

"Hmm?" I blink a few times as Jordan gives me a worried look.

"It's strange right? I know it sounds weird and I haven't known her as long as you, but I honestly feel like there's something going on. I'm not even sure about it. It's hard for me to realize when Jina left. It's like those feelings I had for her are-" He stops and I purse my lips at what's about to come out of his mouth.

"Jina wasn't your fault." I say quietly and Jordan leans against my Jeep, folding his arms with his eyes narrowed to the ground. He looks sad as he chews his bottom lip.

"She left because she thought I couldn't make her happy. Am I really that bad of a person?" He says, almost to himself.

"Jordan you're not a bad person. I know you loved Jina a lot, more than you could ever imagine, but it was her choice to leave. You're a great guy. I know you can always find someone else to make you feel those great things again." I sigh as I think about him and Stella.

Jina impacted Jordan a lot. He became depressed and sad, almost isolating himself. It took him a while to get to himself again, getting the courage to get back to lacrosse and focus on his studies. If he's starting to get feels for Stella...I shouldn't interfere.

Thinking back to how sad and alone Jordan was after Jina, I want him to be happy. He took dating seriously after Jina left. He said he would only date if he felt something special, a spark.

He would only really care for someone if he felt that connection. He's dated girls before Jina as well, but they were only his distractions. He didn't mean any of that until he met Jina.

"Remember what I told you after Jina left?" Jordan says quietly, a small smile on his face.

I nod my head. "Yeah. You'll only date someone if you know you have a spark."

"I hear the sound of bells every time I pass by her. When I was younger, I told myself that whenever I heard the sound of chiming bells in my head, even if I only passed by her once...I knew there was something special. I heard the bells Stuart."

I let it all sink it. It's confirmed. He does like Stella. He feels like he has a special connection with her.

"More than Jina?"  he purses his lips.

He purses his lips. "Jina's the past. I want to get to the present." 

"Give it a go. You never know what might happen." Jordan glances at me, almost in pain.

"Are you sure? You think I'm ready for that stuff again?"

"If you really like her, then it shouldn't matter. You're willing to give it a shot, so do it. It's better to do it now than wait."

I realize that I'm being a coward myself. I haven't told Stella how I really feel, ever since the camping trip, even though Jennie told me to tell her as soon as possible. I've delayed it for such a long time that my best friend is considering his true feelings for a girl I've had my heart stuck on.

Jordan and Stella might be perfect for each other. It's the classic combination of a jock and an artist.

What am I?

I'm not a jock. I'm not an artist. I'm not a nerd or a wallflower.

I'm just a normal, average teenager.

There's nothing special about me. So I must be nothing to Stella.

Jordan sighs tiredly. "It feels weird to think about this stuff again. I haven't done it for a long time. I'll just let time decide what's going to happen. I don't want to rush things instead, I'll take it slow."

"Yeah. You'll develop more if you go slower. Fast relationships don't work out too well."

"Thanks for listening. I know it sounds weird for me to think about this stuff when I'm talking about Stella, whereas you guys don't like each other and would rather rip each others throats out, ye?" He chuckles and I give him a small smile.

Those arguments aren't nothing. There's something. That's something special between us, that we're constantly bickering but it hasn't become hate. It's become something more than that but I think I'm the only one who really thinks that.

I wonder what's going to happen between Jordan and Stella.