BTT x Reader | BloodXLust

Chapter Ninety Seven | GilbertXAffair

I looked myself over in the mirror of my desk as I read the Bible.

I'd probably read more than half in the few weeks I'd been here.

Weeks have passed since Eliza and I began a shameful affair of sorts.

I could lose my dreams.

Eliza could lose her reputation, her future, and her love.

But if Eliza loves him why does she run to me?

Easy.

She's scared to commit to what will be the start of the rest of her life.

I don't have someone I'm in love with so I have it easy.

I do like Eliza but she's not someone I see myself settling with and having kids.

Does this make me her side piece? What the hell?

I sighed as I was again distracted by her.

She'd moved into the mansion. She doesn't share Roderick's room but her room is across the hall until her bed is moved into his after they marry, whenever that will be.

A part of me didn't want it to be soon but at the same time after she began sleeping with him, if he ever manned up to something like that, or even knew how; then I could do the same. The only problem when she gives birth if the baby ends up being mine it will be obvious. I'm albino and Roderick has thick black hair and skin a bit darker than mine. The baby's hair would probably be very light brown if it were mine or very dark brown if it were his.

I can't believe this is the shit I'm thinking about instead of hunting down the demon who killed my friends and put a target on my back and Eliza's.

Only Roderick and Eliza and a few staff know my title is Father Beilshmidt. The hunters that Roderick goes with on their "parties" don't know this so I've tagged along, often distracted by seeing Eliza so dressed up chatting with other women over Tea while she attends to Gretchen. She looks so much like a mother.

How weird for her. How weird for me to notice.

Eliza and I are just friends with benefits, but I wonder if maybe there's a bit of love and not just lustful distraction.

Probably mot as much love as she has for Roderick.

After this demon is gone she won't feel the need to be distracted. She'll probably run to him and marry and forget about me and I'll run back to the knights and serve as a priest.

I don't even want to be a priest, my entire future was based on the decision to get revenge and as soon as that happens that means the rest is purposeless.

God says not to take revenge but I'm sure he doesn't mind if it's a demon.

I tell myself "god won't mind" and "god understands" all the time but I'm just trying to ignore that fact I'm sinning and I'm enjoying it.

I'm enjoying Eliza's hand on me and mine on her. We haven't actually had sex but we get as close as we can and it's euphoric. It's tempting as all hell and habit I worried would manifest that ended up doing so.

How long has it been since I arrived, without progress, a month and a week maybe?

I also haven't been writing too much in my diary.

I haven't written about Eliza other than the surprise she's a woman.

If I keep any record of her affair it risks coming to light.

If we're ever caught the backlash of the situation depends on who catches us.

If it's the mother in law I'm sure all hell will be let loose.