Brightest ✯ Sirius Black

✯sixty-two✯

Cleo was numb. Even worse, was that she was starting to enjoy the way it felt. 

They had all slept for most of the day -- everyone was exhausted. Solace was taken at James and Lily's house in Godric's Hollow, a quaint little brick house. It was perfect for them; there was a great big backyard, a large kitchen for Lily, and plenty of space to raise a family. 

It was nearly dark again. Cleo hadn't slept a wink, and had spent the day in one chair staring out the window. Her form was stoic, her face pale and puffy from all the silent crying she had been doing. She hadn't moved, hadn't fixed her gaze upon anything else. She had been lost in her head since the moment they had arrived.

There was rustling in the corner of her eye and she registered that someone had come down the stairs and sulked into the living room.

"Cleo?" a hoarse whisper called out. She looked over and saw Remus walking in. His hair was a mess and he hadn't changed his clothes since the fight, his sweater ripped at the shoulder and across his chest from the night before. His eyes were red and his nose was running.

"Did you get any sleep?" she asked, her voice void of emotion.

"Not enough. And I doubt I will ever again," he shuddered, sitting down in the chair opposite her. He put his elbows on his knees and rested his chin in his hands, breathing in and out slowly. The street lamps outside began to flicker on and illuminate the night outside.

"She was-" his voice cut through the silence, breaking off painfully. "She... fuck." Remus broke. He put his head down, arms wrapping around the back of his head as his shoulders began to silently shake. Cleo's lip quivered and tears filled her vision. "I loved her," Remus whispered through his sobs. "I loved her so badly."

"Oh Remus," Cleo whispered, squeezing her eyes shut as tears began to pour again over her cheeks. With his head still down, Remus reached his scarred and bruised hand out to her, laying it on her knee. She gripped it tightly, interlacing their fingers and squeezing with all her might. And there, the two friends mourned.

It was nearly 10pm by the time the others began to filter into the living room. Lily and James moved solemnly through their house, Lily putting a kettle on for everyone. Sirius came down later, hair a mess as usual, his face paler than normal. He looked exhausted, but so did everyone. Peter followed, quiet as usual. The twins, Fabian and Gideon, had crashed there as well and came down quieter than anyone had ever seen them before.

The living room was full of people, but no one was speaking. They all sat in different places, eyes transfixed upon the walls or the floor, or the cups of tea in their hands. Lily held her stomach, and everyone wondered why, but no one had the guts to break the silence and ask.

Cleo, meanwhile, was going out of her mind. She wanted to scream until her lungs ran out of air and combusted. She wanted to cry but she had no more tears left in her whole body, she thought. She had cursed the world so many times today but it had yet to strike her down like she wanted. And worst of all, she let one of the only people she cared about most in the world die, at the hands of her own flesh and blood.

In her mind, she had killed Luna herself.

"I killed her," she whispered. Out of shock, and more to herself, but the room was quiet enough that everyone heard.

"Cleo..." James sighed. His wife and baby were okay, but his heart still hurt because one of his oldest friends was in pain. Eyes gazed at him, and then at her.