Hold My Hand - Lashton

Chapter Three

Chapter Three

-

"It smells in here," Ashton remarked as he walked into the kitchen. He knew Luke was in there. He had seen him walk past his ajar door. Likewise, Luke always ate his dinner at exactly six. The blonde ate all three of his meals at the same time every day, or near enough the same time. 

"It's just soup," Luke shrugged with a slight sigh as he placed his book down on the table. He knew the routine too by now. Ashton was going to start talking to him, and he would only be able to read a couple of words before he got lost again.

Ashton peered over the blonde's shoulder at the orange substance and grimaced. "I don't like soup. It seems unnecessary."

Luke just ignored the comment, he wasn't going to argue back or state his opinion. He'd let Ashton diverge the conversation somewhere else. Probably towards the reason why he had entered the kitchen in the first place, it not being a coincidence as he was now leaning against the worktop.

"So we're all going to the pub tonight, you know to celebrate surviving the first week here. And we would really like you to come?"

Luke listened to each word. The use of the third person pronoun 'we'. That all-inclusive pronoun 'we' that made you feel excluded and an outcast if you were not a member of that 'we'. Luke didn't mind being alone and excluded from a group, but he did mind disappointing every member of that group if he declined the offer. It was too much pressure. One carefully constructed sentence could persuade someone to do anything. 

The blonde looked over at Ashton who was watching him patiently. Luke bit his lip and quickly looked back down as they made brief eye contact. "Will you be staying out long?"

Ashton shrugged. "Maybe till eleven or twelve. The pubs close around then anyway. I can walk with you back earlier if you want to go through."

Luke figured that it was Ashton that wanted him to go. He had barely uttered a single word to any of his other flatmates. "I don't want to be a burden. Maybe it'll be best if I just stay here. I'm no fun anyway, I'll just be sat there silent," Luke rambled trying to find any excuse that Ashton would accept.

But the older boy deemed none of them valid. "I know you think yourself a bit of a bore, but despite your minimal interaction with people, they do like you. Even your company is comforting Luke. And if you do want to leave I really will walk back with you, some of the others might want to anyway because they have to be awake early."

Luke sat and thought for a moment, staring out the window where it was nearly dark. He had planned to read through the notes for tomorrows lessons. But he could get up earlier and do them, it wouldn't take too long.

Finally, Luke nodded. "When are you going?"

"In an hour. We're meeting here. I'll give your door a knock if you like?" Luke nodded in confirmation and gave him a small thank you as he continued to eat the rest of his now-cold soup.

-

"What do you want to drink?" Ashton asked, standing up and looking at the blonde who was frozen stiff with fear. He was clearly out of his comfort zone. In a pub with blaring music and too many people who were drunk enough to be unpredictable.

"I'll get my own in a minute, thanks though," Luke replied, disliking when people brought him a drink. It created a burden and he felt he had to continuously remember he owed them a drink.

Ashton shook his head, not giving up. "You don't want to go up there, I know you're scared shitless. You can pay me back if that makes you feel better."

He knew that everything Ashton was saying was correct. He hated ordering. Especially at bars where everyone was pushing and there was no organised, linear line that made him panic. He just stood there and let everyone through. "Um, a coke please," Luke told him, his voice raised over the loud music.

Ashton chuckled and sat back down beside the boy. "Do you really not drink?" he asked curiously. He wasn't going to force him to do something he was not comfortable with, but he really did want the boy to have a relatively normal university experience; be that just having one drink a week.

Luke leaned over a bit so Ashton wasn't so close to him. "Sometimes," Luke answered. "I only really have one with people I'm comfortable with." Ashton had to strain to hear him, the blonde being naturally quiet.

Nodding understandingly, Ashton stood back up and made his way to the bar. Meanwhile Luke sat still as a stone as his eyes scattered around the room. There were people standing, sitting, talking, drinking, laughing and some even dancing.

"How you doing Luke?" a girl asked from across the table. She lived in the room next to Luke and she liked to play her music out loud when she had a shower. Luke didn't mind though.

Luke nodded. "I'm good." It was unconvincing, but he didn't think this was as bad as he thought it would be. But he knew it would get worse as the night went on, and more alcohol entered their systems.

Ashton was soon back and placed a coke down in front of the blonde, and had his own beer. Luke didn't know what it was, and he didn't really want to either.

"He must like you, Ashton," the girl spoke up as he sat down beside the blonde once again. "You bring him out of his shell!"

Ashton chuckled looking at Luke, gently punching his shoulder. "Just got to make him feel comfortable and know his limits."

Sometimes Ashton didn't know his limits, but Luke realised that couldn't be helped with the older boys manic episodes. He was going to be intrusive, and Luke was going to have to accept that whatever he said was not malicious.

Luke took a sip of his coke and smiled. He hadn't had a fizzy drink since he had been here, and the cold liquid was refreshing and comforting. Whilst it was a drink that was universal. it reminded him of home, a place where he felt at ease.

Ashton was watching the boy inspect his coke. He wondered if Luke thought he had got the barman to add a dash of vodka. But, there was nothing but ice and lemon in there. Ashton didn't know what Luke was thinking, if he was having any fun at all. He stood out like a sore thumb. He was alert like a rabbit in the presence of a predator. Preparing himself for whatever may come his way.

His leg was bouncing up and down, Ashton could feel the vibrations from beside him. Taking a deep breath, he gently placed his hand on the boy's thigh in hopes to calm him. However, Luke's eyes widened and he suddenly moved his leg away from Ashton.

"Sorry," Ashton quickly apologising, realising how weird that must have been. How it could be interpreted. "You were shaking. Just wanted to calm you down."

Luke nodded acceptingly with a small smile. "Don't like being touched, that's all."

Ashton chuckled. "You may as well come out and say you just hate human beings, Luke. That you wish to be the only one on the planet."

Once again, Luke knew it was a joke. And he didn't feel the need to worry about what the boy meant. He remained as calm as he previously was. "That would be nice," he agreed, smiling a little more.

"Could you make room for one more person in that world?" Ashton asked cheekily, with a small wink.

Luke blushed and looked down at his lap, beginning to fiddle with his hands. "Potentially."

-

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Thank you so much for reading.