In the Melancholy Moonlight

Chapter XXIII: Lilac

LUCY:

On the last night of the summer holidays, I found myself trying to finish Wandering with Werewolves far too late into the night. I had read the rest of the booklist already, of course, but given the contents of all of Lockhart's other books, I didn't want to read that one. But it was required reading, and I didn't want to try to read it on the train the next day.

I began to cry when he described the way he pinned the werewolf against the wall of the telephone booth. I wanted to scream that it wasn't the werewolf's fault he was who he was. I cried even harder when he held his wand to the werewolf's neck. I couldn't take it anymore. I slammed the book shut and stared up at the summer stars, blurred though they were by my tears.

The door creaked open slowly. "Lu? What are you still doing up?"

I turned my tear-stained face to Cedric. "Just on time, as always. What are you still doing up?"

"I woke up a few minutes ago and figured I'd make sure my bag was packed when I heard a book slam shut and saw light beneath your door. What's wrong?"

I held the book up. "I waited until the last possible second to read this, and now I know why. I left off with the werewolf cornered in the phone booth. I don't want to read about Lockhart taking care of him the way he 'takes care' of every other monster he fights. Reading this, I know it could just as easily be me in that phone booth."

"Lu, that werewolf did horrible things. You haven't."

"I could," I whispered.

"But you wouldn't. I know you wouldn't."

"You don't know that," I whimpered, sniffling and leaning into his shoulder. I began to cry harder. "I have no control over myself without wolfsbane. Ced, I've known all my life I'm a monster. It was nice this summer to be able to hide in my room when I felt bad and go into the woods knowing I'd come home to see the light on and you sitting on the front porch waiting for me with a glass of water and a smile and a blanket, but going back to school, I won't have that. I'll have to go to class every day regardless of how I feel. I'll be in the Shrieking Shack by myself every month because everyone's scared of me. And on top of that, I'll have a teacher that would kill me if he knew who I was, just like he killed this poor werewolf who didn't know any better!"

He let me cry for several minutes, rubbing his hand up and down my arm wordlessly. "He didn't kill the werewolf, Lu," he said after a moment. "He used a homorphus charm to turn him back into a man."

I sniffled. "That's a nearly impossible charm. How did he manage?"

"I don't know," he admitted. "Probably both luck and skill. Don't finish reading the book, Lu. It's not good for you."

"Okay," I said softly, burying my face against Cedric's chest. "Thank you for coming to check on me."

"Of course. It's our last night here until Christmas. I wanted to do what I could to help."

"You're the best," I murmured, my eyes sinking shut.

"To quote Henry every time I tell him that, 'I try to be, but I think you're the best.'" I could hear the smile in his voice as he scooped me up and carried me to my bed. He tucked a blanket around me and blew out the candles. "Good night, Lu. Love you."

"Good night, Ced," I replied. "Love you too."

He smiled and shut the door softly. I heaved one more shuddering sigh and fell asleep.

I didn't need to hold Cedric's hand to enter the platform that year, though I did let him go first. I scanned the crowd for any tall redheads, but I couldn't see them, and Cedric couldn't either. He spotted Henry right away though, and was careful to make sure I followed him, after the Knockturn Alley incident. I spotted Hermione after a couple of minutes, and darted over to her.