In the Melancholy Moonlight

Chapter LIX: To Celebrate a Fleeting Moment

"To love someone fiercely, to believe in something with your whole heart, to celebrate a fleeting moment in time, to fully engage in a life that doesn't come with guarantees --- these are risks that involve vulnerability and often pain. But I'm learning that recognizing and leaning into the discomfort of vulnerability teaches us how to live with joy, gratitude and grace."
Brené Brown

LUCY:

The sense of miraculous calm I had felt the night before disappeared the second I opened my eyes Tuesday morning. My hands shook violently as I tried to get dressed.

You have to keep it together, Lucy, I told myself sternly as my trembling hands attempted to button my bookbag. You can't let Cedric or Harry see how scared you are. You need to be strong, for their sakes. You being nervous will just make them even more terrified than they already are.

And so I did my best to appear unfazed. I stuck close to Harry throughout the morning, smiling at the people who wished him good luck and glaring at the people who continued to mock him. He stuck out from the crowd, wearing a special set of robes and a jacket reading POTTER in large red letters across the back. When I passed Cedric on our way to Herbology, I could see he was wearing the same robes in yellow with DIGGORY across the back. I offered him a reassuring smile, but I could see the apprehension in his eyes even as he smiled back.

When lunch came around, I found myself incapable of eating a single bite. I sipped occasionally on the cold water in my goblet, but I doubted my stomach could support much else.

Professor McGonagall approached the place where Harry and I were sitting alone ten minutes later. "Potter, the champions have to come down onto the grounds now. You have to get ready for your first task."

Harry dropped his fork with a loud clatter. "Okay."

"C-Can I come too, Professor?" I asked, seeing Professor Sprout leading Cedric from the Hufflepuff table. "I won't go into the tent, but- but can I walk down with them?"

Professor McGonagall followed my gaze and nodded. "Of course. Quickly, now."

I jumped up from the table as the three of us hurried over to Professor Sprout and my brother. I positioned myself firmly between Cedric and Harry, Cedric to my left and Harry to my right, trying to ignore the way my heart felt like it was trying to burst out of my chest.

We walked down to the edge of the forest in silence, a frigid wind whipping around us. I found myself wishing I had grabbed a scarf, then chided myself for thinking of something so trivial as my two favorite people in the entire world were about to face dragons.

Soon enough, we reached a tent that had been erected sometime between Saturday night and Tuesday morning. Professor McGonagall and Professor Sprout turned to their respective champions, and I wrapped my arms around my waist as I stood in between the two halves of who I was. My brother on my left, my best friend on my right. The Hufflepuff I used to think I was and the Gryffindor I now knew myself to be. My foundation on my left, my future (I hoped) on my right. Torn apart by the knowledge that one --- or Merlin forbid, both --- might not make it through the hour. I felt sick, but I had to hold it together just a moment longer, because suddenly, Harry was turning to me.

"Good luck," I squeaked, hugging him tightly. He hugged back, shaking. As we pulled away, I managed a small smile. "Nine minutes, you hear me?"

He tried to smile back, but it died instantly on his lips. "I'll do my best."

"That's all I ask," I whispered as he headed in the direction of the tent.

I spun on my heel and flung myself at Cedric. He hugged back with equal ferocity.