CPR 2

39

Aaliyah
I woke up and looked over seeing Rayne still sleeping surprisingly. I could see some light coming in from the blinds in the room. I grabbed my phone and it was a little bit past nine. I stood up and looked in this mirror he had in the room and I looked like shit. My eyes were puffy from crying and my hair was messy.

I opened the door and heard music coming from the living room. I needed to get a tooth brush and a wash cloth asap. As I got closer I listened in more to the music. He looked up from his laptop and smiled pausing the music.

"Hey good morning." I crossed my arms as I leaned against the wall.

"Wassup how you feel?" He asked.

I shrugged my shoulders and he patted the space next to him. I walked over and took a seat sitting with my legs under me.

"I'm just tired and I feel like I didn't get any sleep even though I slept. I feel like my heart and my mind is playing tug of war. D'angelo, I don't know what to do or what to feel at all. I just feel really really lost and empty right..and that scares me." I spoke slowly.

"I don't know how much y'all talked about this yesterday but I think y'all need to have a one on one. You need to have a heart to heart with him and put everything out on the table. He probably got some shit he wanna say too and I'm sure this is just as hard for him."

"Part of me feels like I'm overreacting and being dramatic but my feelings...I feel hurt and heartbroken. I feel like I'm being too hard on him when this was out of his control but I needed this space to think this out." I vented.

"It's two things you need to keep in mind and the first one is he didn't cheat on you and make this baby. The second thing is he didn't keep this a secret and he told you as soon as he found out. If he did any of this I wouldn't be having the same conversation with you right now."

"Yeah I know.." I looked down into my lap.

"You hesitating." He acknowledged.

"I need to just not think about this until he gets the results back but I can't. I can't just go on like everything is normal right now. I'm going to be stressing for the next week about this shit."

"For right now you just need to talk to that man Aaliyah. Take shit one step at a time and maybe this conversation will help a little. Don't ignore him or run from him because you don't want to face your feelings."

"He can't know what you're thinking or really feeling if you don't communicate that. You left this man and he probably think it's over."

"He told me he felt like he was losing me too. I'm such a dumb ass." I shook my head feeling guilty.

"Nah you not dumb you just have a hard time appropriately picking apart your feelings."
•••
Carti
I woke up and reached for Aaliyah but quickly remembered she wasn't here. I rolled over and rubbed my eyes and started thinking about everything all over again. I knew there was nothing that I could do about any of this besides taking that test. I didn't know what Aaliyah was thinking or what she felt and that bothers me.

I grabbed my phone off of my night stand and turned it on. Once it came back on there wasn't really anything new. I clicked on my contacts and scrolled until I found my moms name and called her. As the phone rung I got out of bed and started walking around the house.

"Hey sweetie what up?" She answered.

"Ma I need to talk to you about something because I don't know what to do." I said walking into the kitchen.