Why Can't I Hate You

{ 26 }

Vallyk~

I sat in my room crying softly hugging my pillow. I felt like shit, I cheated on my boyfriend that loves me to the moons and back but I don't feel the same for him.

I have people telling me to die and that this Dejuane person is dead and there accusing me of doing it and on to top of that I have all these feelings Inside that just make me wanna explode.

I just wanna make it stop, why can't it stop. Why can't I just be happy for once even if it is just for a second.
-

I hugged my pillow tightly while crying when I felt someone sit beside me. The person turned me around and I new who it was because he does this all the time when I'm sad but it will feel wrong.

"Bobby" I said sitting up. "Yes bubba" He said looking at me making me feel worse. "I have something to tell you" I said and he nodded.

"I cheated and I'm sorry I don't wanna be with you knowing what I did to you it'll just make me feel guilty more then I already do about the situation. But trust me I love you just not as much as you love me, I can't fake love so I'm being honest with you now, you deserve so much better and that's just not me... I'm sorry" I said Looking down. It was quiet before he started talking.

"I understand and I forgive you for telling me the truth but I'll never forget I love you and I will always love you and I'm sorry that my love wasn't enough for you but I wish you well with next person your with, goodbye Vallyk" He said before getting up and leaving. Once he shut my door I continued to ball my eye's out.

I sat there crying unitil Derek walked in. I looked at him with my red puffy eyes. "I-I told h-him I-i cheated" I stuttered out and he quickly came and hugged me. "You did the right thing" he wispered in my ear. "No I didn't, cheating with your best friend isn't doing the right thing" I said and he let me go.

"I know Vallyk but you can't earase the past, you can only fix the future" he said to me. "What you did with Mike is over, you chose who you wanna be with" I nodded looking down.

"You don't need a man to make you happy, you are beautiful and never forget that" He said with a smile whipping my tears. "Now cheer up, were gonna go out" I smiled and went on my way.

I really am happy I have a best friend like Derek.

~~~~~~

Me and Derek walked in the dance studio and I smiled. "You like it" He asked and I nodded smiling harder. We walked in a room and they were dancing. everyone stopped and look at us.

"Oh hello there, you must be Vallyk and Derek" the choreographer said and we nodded. "Ok, ok, well I'm Ms, Jackson but call me Becka" she said and me and Derek smiled.

"You can put your stuff over they and hop in line and we'll get started" me and Derek obeyed.

~~~~

It was towards the end of the class and the teacher wanted us to free style. "How about Vallyk goes first" one of the boys in the class said but I shrugged and stepped in the middle of the floor.

Once the music came on I heard Go crazy by Chris Brown and just went at it. I got alot of Aye's and screams while I danced.

Derek was recording and so was everybody else. Once the song was over they all cheered making me smile. "That was some good dancing Vallyk" Becka said and I smiled. "Thank you" She modded. "The class and I also wanted to know how would you feel about joining the team" she said and I looked at her

"You for real" I said and she nodded. I stood there for a second until I started jumping up and down and screaming yes. "LET'S GO!" The team screamed and started clapping.

"Well practices is on Monday's and Thursday's from 9-11pm" I nodded and she smiled. "Well we'll see you on Thursday" she said with a smile and I smiled.

"Bye guy's" I said before leaving with Derek. Once we got outside I hugged Derek rightly. "Thank you bestie" I said and he smiled. "Your welcome Val"

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One more period, pray for me🤚🏾