Eye of the Beholder (Loki Love Story)

Chapter 29 Troubled Minds

The next few hours go by very slowly as we stay in the throne room with Odin and Frigga as the warriors leave with Thor to lockdown the palace. It's taking a while as they seal every door and window and put up the magical barrier to protect from physical and magical attacks. As well as rounding up all the warriors and preparing for the Dark Order's return. It's quite an ordeal but it's making me feel safer, all this extra security. Even though I have tried not think about it as I have chilled with Loki and his parents, discussing what we want our wedding to be like and talk about anything but the Order.

It's been a lovely distraction imagining what our wedding day could look like and for a moment I forgot about the Dark Order, Damian and all the extra security. We can just think about our future and it makes me smile. Our future and yet I am worried that the Dark Order will jeopardise all of that.

Once the palace was locked down, me and Loki retreated to our chambers so we could have a private dinner and some peace and quiet. It's been a long day and we just wanted to be alone together, just us. So we ended up just having dinner in bed before lying beside each other, Loki reading to me like he used to back when I was blind. He knows I find his voice soothing and it helps me relax which is why he wanted to read to me. But even with me laying in Loki's arms, listening to his voice, I am not relaxed. I am tense and all I think about is the Order.

They nearly got me today. That disturbing thought has just hit me and I know I was close to being taken but I didn't really let myself think about it. I was too distracted with the tight ropes and then Loki's proposal. It has only just occurred to me that the Dark Order who destroyed my kingdom along with my parents nearly got me. Nearly took me and we don't even know why they want me. And now the palace is in Lockdown, preparing for the next attack and we all in danger. Especially me and I'm terrified they are going to attack again and this time I won't get away. They will take me and... and I fear what will happen? Will they kill me like my parents after taking my powers? Or something else? Whatever their plan is, I doubt I will survive.

I frown as I try not to think about it and I find myself fiddling with the engagement ring on my finger. I am engaged to Loki, the man I love and yet I fear what could happen to him. He is so determined to protect me and I love that about him. I really love him and the idea of marrying him, makes me so happy. His proposal was so sweet and loving and then the ring... so beautiful. But I have this horrible feeling that I could lose him if I'm not careful. He wants to protect me, save me so much that I fear he would die protecting me. And the sheer idea of losing him terrifies me more than anything even more than the threat of the order. I just can't lose Loki. I love him too much.... I think it would break me if something bad happened to him.

The sheer thought hurts and the idea of Loki dead flashes in my mind and I feel myself tense up. What if they break in and Loki dies protecting me? Gets hurt? I try to relax and not think about it but I can't help it. The last thing I want is for him to die for me. I love him so much and losing him... I don't think I could cope if I ever lost him.

I'm so distracted with my thoughts, the notion of losing Loki that I haven't realised that he has stopped reading out loud to me. He has put the book down and staring at me intently, worried.

"Katrina what's wrong?" He asks me, "Talk to me my love."

I force a smile, "Nothing's wrong."

He gives me a look, "Katrina I am the god of mischief and famous for my silver tongue, do you really think I can't tell when you're lying?" I frown before he says, "Please talk to me. What is troubling you? Is it the Order? Or something else?"

I take a breath, "Actually... I'm worried about you." He looks at me confused so I add, "About losing you."

He shakes his head, "You're not going to lose me."

I pull away from him, forcing myself to sit up properly against the head board, "Damian and his order are not going to stop coming for me and I fear... that you could get hurt protecting me or even die and the idea of losing you..."

He interrupts me, moving to sit up beside me, "Katrina nothing bad is going to happen to me."

"You can't say that." I look at him, feeling the tears brimming, "I know you Loki. I know you would do anything for me and I know that includes dying. You can't deny it either. I know if the Order attacked right now you would do anything to save me including giving up your life. And I can't lose you Loki, I just can't. It would terrify me, break me if something..."

He interrupts me again, putting his finger on my lips, "Yes, you're right. I would give up my life for yours. I would do it in a heartbeat. I don't think I would even hesitate. But you're not going to lose me."

I look at him, moving his finger aside, "But you just said..."

"You won't lose me." He reassures me, "I have escaped death many times, it's one of my things, resurrecting. It annoys my brother a lot." We chuckle at that, "Yes I would give up my life for yours but it doesn't mean it's going to happen. I will protect you but I have every intention to keep us both alive and together."

"Loki I can't lose you." I whisper.

He smiles at me, "You won't. The palace is in lockdown, magically warded and the warriors are patrolling everywhere. When they do come, we will defeat them and we will be together. So I promise you, you won't lose me, not any time soon. I love you and I won't let anything break us apart."

I smile, "You and your silver tongue, always know how to cheer me up. But it doesn't mean that I am not worried."

"Then maybe I should distract you." He says with a mischievous grin.

"How are you going to do that?" I ask him, intrigued.