Just friends? [ ✓ ]

SEVENTEEN

"If you want to fly, give up everything that's weighs you down." - Buddha

Warning(s): intrusive thoughts

Noah's POV

He hasn't gotten back yet. And man I promised I would spam call him but I'm worried-

*Insert key sounds 🤡✨*

"Noah! I'm back." I hear him yell, and I went downstairs absolutely lightning fast. "You're back earlier than expected." I smiled, but I wasn't lying. He did say he would be back late, but it's only 2:41, "Yeah we didn't take to long talking. But I am leaving tomorrow to Japan.." He suddenly says, "Wait- So you're leaving again..?" He sighed sitting down in the sofa running a hand through his hair, "Yeah. Kata is taking me to Japan to, visit my dad's grave for his birthday.."

Makes sense. "When are you gonna be coming back?" I asked, "In maybe about a week? I'll have to stay for a few days for a photoshoot/interview with a modeling agency." "Right..Well I hope everything goes well." I smiled, he looked at me with a sort of troubled look. "Yeah..I hope so to. If they let me keep any pictures, I'll send them to the groupchat for you guys to see." He smiled, "Great." I gave him a smile back. Damn, I wish I could just tell him that I like him. But I can't. Man, I'm definitely gonna miss him.

Next day

"Bye Noah." He waved at me before taking his suitcase and rolling outside the house putting it into the back to Kyosuke's car. "Good luck on the photoshoot!" I yelled at him smiling, he smiled and nodded getting into the car and closing the door. Before they drove away.

On the plane (Blake's pov)

And it's finally time...Jeez. I'm shaking, Kata hasn't noticed so that's good at least. Just two more hours until we get there. It'll be okay..

Okay tw now for intrusive thoughts

Why did you suddenly agree to see him now? We're you to fed up of being such a horrible son? You never visited him after he died. You're a horrible son. A horrible person, you're useless. You have to live off your fathers friend. You can't even keep a job. You don't deserve to be here. Maybe your life is so horrible because you actually deserve it. You don't deserve to be happy. You don't deserve ANYTHING.

"Stop..Just stop..." I mumbled softly hitting myself head.

You're USELESS. Absolutely USLESS. WORTHLESS. STUPID. YOU'RE WORTH NOTHING.

"STOP...!-" I yelled my streams of tears running down my face as I clutched the sides of the seat. My chest heaving up and down as I attempted to breathe. Keyword: attempted. I couldn't breathe, not properly at least. But this caught Kata's attention. "Blake. Blake. Calm down." He said to me moving from his seat to the one next to mine. Placing a hand on my back. "Just. Breathe." His usual cold and stoic voice, sounded more calming, it reminded me of how Juzo would talk to me when I wasn't feeling well. So I nodded and tried to breathe normally again.

My shaky breathes turned into now more full normal breathes, as I calmed down. Bringing my sleeves to my face and wiping off my tears. "Thanks..." He nodded. "How long have these been going on." He asked, "A few..maybe months after Juzo died." I answered rubbing my head. As I always get a headache after I have, bad thoughts.

"Have you seen a professional for help?" "No. I don't want to see a professional." I said sternly. And I wasn't lying. I hate talking to a 'professional' about my problems. "Okay. Do you at least have someone to speak with?" I nodded, I had Christa, Brittney, and Alex to talk to them about it. Maybe Noah, but I don't know if I could really speak to him about it.

But whatever. "Look. I'm not great at these type of things, but attempt to take a nap and I will wake you up once we reach Japan." He have a sort of nervous, but sincere smile. I nodded and looked out the window away in quickly falling asleep.

With Noah

'They should be in Japan by now..But he hasn't messaged me. But it's fine, I'm sure he's okay.' He sighed rubbing his forehead. He was sure it would all be okay. For now he should just focus on making sure the house stayed clean-

*Knock knock*

Noah looked up at the door. Consider he headed there opening it to see Christa and Alex, "Gah-Hey you guys!" He smiled, "Hey Noah! We thought that we could all hang out for a bit meanwhile Brittney and Jay go do something." Christa smiled, Alex on the other hand looked a bit nervous, "Sure, that sounds nice." Noah said letting them both in the house. "Alex, you okay..?" He asked. "Mhm.." Christa looked back at him and sighed, "Alex..I already told you they aren't don't anything wrong," She walked over to him, "Trust me."

Noah then realized, Alex must think that Jay is cheating on him. He also remembered how Blake told him that Alex has some deep trust issues due to things from his past. "Alex, Blake and I already told him that if he ever hurt you, we'd kill him. So don't worry." Noah smiled trying to reassure him, Alex looked up at him and sniffed before nodding and smiling.