[H.38] High School: Diary Entry Thirty-Eight

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After a long talk with your parents, Kuroko travels upstairs to your room. There he finds you balled up in your blankets with soft pop music playing in the background. His fist gently taps against the door, announcing his presence.

"Can I come in?" he asks. When he hears your sniffling and a muffled 'mhm', he enters your room, leaving the door slightly ajar for your comfort. 

The first thing he notices is that you refuse to look at him. You haven't looked at him since he found you there crying. When paramedics came to inspect you, your hallow gaze was always downcast. You even refused to speak to the principal and teachers until your parents arrived to whisk you off back home. 

He takes a seat on the bed next to you, his sympathetic stare remaining on you. You both stay like this for a few minutes yet neither of you feel the time passing. It isn't until you finally find a bout of courage that you speak up. 

"A-Am I a whore?"

The questions leaves the boy bewildered. He recalls the time you were branded a slut by Minato-senpai, but for the word to reach a new level of derogatory, he wonders where you might have picked that up. 

"No, you aren't," Kuroko states simply. "Who said that to you?"

"Yuuka." You try to grit your teeth to hold back the onslaught of tears. "She called me that when I said that he was touching me inappropriately. I was so scared it was true, that it was my fault that my teacher wanted to do this to me. That you would hate me for it."

Kuroko feels as if his heart is breaking at the sound of your distressed rumination. "I... would never think that of you. Never."

The sincerity in his voice disperses your chaotic thoughts, alleviating the burden of Yuuka's verbal assault. Another sniffle and you begin to shed your comforter. Upon viewing his genuine expression, you know his words to be absolute. 

He doesn't waver at your disheveled sight-- hair in disarray, eyes reddened, and lackluster skin. No matter the havoc you possess, he can never find you ugly. " I know you, [F.Name], and I know who you are. You're the most beautiful person to me, inside and out."

His words bring an incursion of emotions and you return to sobbing once more. This time, however, his shirt soaks up your tears as you hold onto him tightly. 

[___]

An hour has passed and you have since calmed down. With Kuroko's gentle prodding, you took a long warm bath and went through your usual skincare routine. You find it hard to face yourself in the mirror as guilt and shame bubble at the sight of yourself, but Kuroko whispers his kind words that causes a stillness in your mind.

You sit down at the futon in your room and Kuroko stations himself behind you. With a brush on hand and a detangling spray, he combs through your knots, starting from the bottom then up. As he makes his way softly through your locks, he strikes up another conversation in hopes of garnering any expectations of the future.

"Have you thought about going back?"

You shake your head. "I don't want to, not there... They will look at me and think bad thoughts of me."

"[F/n], you can't stop that wherever you go. Even if this didn't happen, people will always look and create their own perception of you. That is the nature of things," he explains as he finishes a section of your hair. He begins the next section and continues, "You don't have to go back, but you will have to learn to ignore what others think of you."

"That's easier said than done," you mumble.

"I know, but that doesn't mean it isn't worth trying," he counters. 

"It's just... It feels like it will be a giant hurdle to ignore the entire student body at that school. I don't think I can..."

The defeat in your voice is palpable and it spurs him on to suggest a solution. "Do you want to go to my school then? Your parents are thinking of that or homeschool."

Your body flinches before turning to face him. He spots the cogwheels in your head turning rapidly as you map out the options, but you come to a quick conclusion at the thought of your one need.

"I just want to be with you."

The simple answer brings Kuroko to a full halt. It takes him a minute to digest the response before he supplies one, "Okay, then we can work something out. I'll see if your parents can put you in a class with Riko. She can keep an eye on you and then you can be our club manager. That way you will always be watched."

"But what if..."

"You don't have to go back. You can be homeschooled and not have to worry about others."

"I don't... I don't want to let that asshole take everything from me," you fiercely state. "There are people out there who had it way worse than me and still live the most of their lives."

"You don't have to compare yourself with others. Everyone heals and reacts differently," he reminds you.

"But... I can't let him win," you whisper out.

Kuroko's eyes widen at your admission. "We won't let him win then. Come to my school, and I'll do everything in power to keep you safe."

It's a promise he intends to keep, one you know he will keep.

[x]

A/N: Two more chapters. AHHHHHHHHH!! I'm so happy I made it this far. Also wtf, why is this book #3 in kuroko. What in the world, the way Wattpad ranks things is weird. Thank you for reading, hope you guys enjoyed the small update <3


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