Need You (ShinDeku)

Ch. 10 - shampoo

A/N: not sure if I already said this bcs my memory is shit but in my story every dorm has its own bathroom, for plot convenience. Also, why do I never realize how angsty my work is until after I've written it? I swear I don't mean too, it just happens.

Trigger warning:
Mentions of PTSD, bullying, and injuries (not self inflicted). the majority of this chapter is within the triggering section, so if you decide not to read past the warning (⚠️), here is your summary:
He takes a bath and comments to himself how good the shampoo smells, then gets out and changes into his pajama pants and one of Shinso's tank-tops. Shinso helps him with re-applying the bandages on his arms and he goes to bed while Shinso stays up to finish some schoolwork.
If you decide to,
Have fun reading!

Deku POV

     I was able to eat most of the food in the bowl, but I drank all the tea that he made. It was really good, and just like he said, it felt good on my throat.

Shinso suggested that I take a shower because it might feel nice, but I can't really stand so we decided it would be easier for me to take a bath. He grabbed me some clothes from my bag by the door and filled the bathtub as well.

(⚠️Trigger warning start⚠️)

I told him that I would be fine by myself but as soon as the door to the bathroom closed I started feeling paranoid again and started crying. He heard me and practically burst through the door to calm me down.

"Can you, um, leave the door open? You don't have to be in here or anything, I just, uhm,-"

"You sure you don't want me to stay?"

"Um, yeah. I'll be fine. Th-thanks."

I covered my face with my hands because I'm pretty sure I was bright red.

Thankfully, he left the room, and I focused on trying to get undressed with one hand. It wasn't too difficult considering I was still only wearing the hospital gown and Shinso's school jacket.

I carefully moved to sit on the ledge of the bathtub from the wheelchair and submerged my feet into the water.

Immediately I groaned in satisfaction. I've never been so happy for a bath in my life. I slowly lowered myself fully into the bath and let out a sigh of relief. I am never taking a bath for granted again.

I relish in the warmth for a bit longer before submerging my hair underwater and grabbing Shinso's shampoo. It smells amazing- like cedar wood and citrus. I let out a quiet moan at the scent. Maybe it's because I was stuck in a gross basement for months, but I didn't know a smell could be so attractive.

I wonder if- my cheeks heat up. Shinso definitely smells like this. I chew on my lip, shinso's gorgeous eyes staring back at me in my head.

"He's so beautiful." I whisper to myself.

Taking a bath with one hand was harder than I thought, but I managed- thankfully. I don't think I would have the courage to ask Shinso for help taking a bath. That would be really embarrassing. Also, I don't want him to see the scars that I purposefully didn't look at when taking the bath. I made sure to scrub my whole body until it was bright red and everything burned. I didn't want any trace of what happened on my skin. Every place they touched me, every single time their skin came into contact with mine, I scrubbed.

If only it was that easy to erase those memories.

When I was done I could still feel the ghosts of their hands all over, but the water was getting cold so I knew I needed to get out.