~ HIS ANGEL BOY SERIES, BOOK 1 ✔ ~
"Don't try to fool yourself into thinking you didn't feel anything, Leto."
"I don't have to fool myself as I don't feel anything for you."
"Don't lie, don't make me do something I might regret."
"I doubt a creature...
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~Leto~
'it is a terrifying thing to watch love walk in your direction when you believe you are not ready to receive it.
in the same manner,
it is quite terrifying watching love walk away from you when you are not yet ready to let go.'
- 'the terrifying thing about love' by Madalina Coman from 'unforgettable'
~
Three months have gone by and I have never been this happy (well in this life anyway), Cairo finally made an appearance after his relapse, it has been so good to see him better, it was worrying to hear that he was in a bad way, but knowing him he has always been so strong and having Jay at his side- he is stronger than ever, he has practically glued himself to the inside of Jay's arms.
Sigh.
Two days ago I noticed after Freddie had sneakily managed to distract me to leave the kitchen, leaving Tal and Enzo completely alone after three months of ignoring each other, that something is definitely up with them- although I tried to not think about it while Freddie cuddled me all night, I could not sleep, all I could think about was the two of them.
They love each other.
I don't know what the problem is but I don't want to pry, I just wish there was something I could do to help them in any way that I can- but I can't.
Sitting up in bed with Freddie still sleeping peacefully beside me, the room still a little bit dark, even with no windows the light still somehow manages to get in, a dread fills me up as I feel myself being pulled towards something, knowing that I have to obey, my Lightmir's good nature telling me that it is the right thing to do, no matter what it is.
It hits me right in the middle of my chest, almost winding me, my breath deep and almost like I can't feel, like the mundane part of my brain telling me that it is time to let it go, time to fully let in my Lightmir.
Let the humans go.
It whispers through my veins like it has the right to, like just because it lives inside of me it doesn't mean that I have to let it completely consume me.
Stop caring.
No.
Stop taking the pain.
No.
Mundanes do not deserve your kind heart, they do not care to even know of your existence, so just let them all go.
Shaking my head I force that part of me out of my mind, once I do all the pain of the world instantly fills me up, clutching my sides I try to still it, if I don't I will be the one being controlled.
