Uproar /PJM FF

Chapter 21

Jimin stepped inside his mansion, letting the sound of the door closing, echo around him for a bit, as he stood still in place.

This night was surely something he had not thought he would ever live nor he was something he could take. All he did was pretend. Act better than he had ever done before because his brother was hanging by a threat in front of him and he could not afford to break too.

After leaving that hotel he had made sure to stay with Taehyung at his vehicle for a bit, trying to calm him down with reassuring words. What did this all matter -he had dared to tell him- he was still his brother and will always be so. He was his family and will continue to be that. And their parents too will continue to be only them, because they were the ones that loved them truly. So what did all this matter? 

Jimin couldn't help but laugh to himself, recalling his own words towards Taehyung and feeling how ridiculous he was. Because he knew, that what hurt was not the change. What must be eating Taehyung alive was the exact same thing that was eating him alive at that exact moment. It was utter guilt and devastation. It was self-blame and desperation to turn back time even for a bit. It was the self-hatred that had rose within him and was burning his chest like a wildfire.

He knew yet he didn't dare to bring the conversation there. Instead, he just smiled at him and hugged him, before telling him to go home, promising that everything will be alright soon enough. A statement that wasn't really in his command yet he still had spoken of it with belief, because at that moment one of them had to be the strong one.

After he stayed and saw Taehyung driving off, Jimin had called Sira, letting her shortly know that Taehyung was not at his best even though he didn't tell her about the reason, then he thanked her shortly since he had basically left on her the weight of the emotions his brother was feeling. Emotions which he was not strong enough for the moment to take on his own shoulders.

He started walking down the hall, his footsteps echoing into the darkness as he was the only one there. He passed by the living room and headed towards the library, in which no one had entered since the last time you had cleaned it some months ago when you were still his student.

He opened the door and stepped down the stairs, ignoring the dust that had gathered and approached the desk which he personally had kept clean. He sat on his chair and dared to light up the lamp that was resting at the side of the desk, then he proceeded to get out of his pocket his keys, among which one of them belong to the shelve at the side, which he unlocked and took out of his dear photo album.

His fingers traced down the cover off it slowly, as if he was travelling back in time just by feeling that piece of hardcover. He had it for so many years and it was full of so many happy memories of his life. Like a treasure box, it held all he ever had felt dearly for.

A  shaky breath escaped his lips right before he found the courage to open it and came face to face with his first photo. There he was, a smiling baby at the arms of his dear mother. At the arms of the woman whom he considered as the fairy of his life. The one that proved to be so much more than just that today.

He couldn't help but left his eyes to linger on his mother's face, seeing this picture for the first time in his life, with eyes way different than he used to. Even though Jimin was always grateful for her existence in his life, and she always managed to bring a nostalgic feeling to him whenever she was to come and look back at her. Tonight he felt more than nostalgia and something way too different than happiness.

His breath felt heavier and heavier as he inhaled it, an invisible hand soon feeling as if it got wrapped around his throat and tighten him, enough to make him feel pain swelling upon his chest. He parted his lips a bit more, in an attempt to breath better as he turned the page, only to face another picture that cut him sharp and quick. There he was, his father standing at the side of his mother, little Jimin in the middle while another baby rested in his mother's arms.