Life As A Teasdale

Ch.164

We've been in Japan and they have the day off. No one knows about the night on Valentine's or at least what happened. Whenever I walk past him I want to so badly just say "love you" it's something I miss so terribly much.

I stayed in with Harry, Niall, and Cal. I laid on the bed and listened to their conversation about which movie we should watch. This trip has been a little stressful because I feel so off and out of place. Even though I'm not.

"How about you just go get the candy from my room and then we'll start the movie" Niall was getting mad and it was funny.

"If I get it come with me" I stood up and he threw a pillow down.

"Okay" He got up and pushed passed Harry and we walked out the door.

It was so plain in this hotel as we walked to his room.

"So I don't know if you want to tell me which is cool but how are things between you and Harry?"

"Uh um I'm not really sure. I know we're good but I don't know what's going to happen next"

"Do you want something to happen?"

"If something does I hope it's good" I smiled and he nodded.

"Why do you ask?"

"Just wondering, I see the way he looks at you and how you look back"

"What's that suppose to mean"

"That you love each other" I looked forward and smiled.

I'm glad he loves me.

We opened his door and grabbed the piles of candy he has and walked back. Cal opened the door and I tossed the candy I had on the couch. Harry was laying in the bed and I sat on the end.

"Scoot up" He whispered and I turned around.

"Please" He mouthed and I did as he said.

It was dark in the room and it brought back the memories of the time before we dated and sat on a floor watching a movie with everyone.

When I laid under the covers I felt him stretch out and his leg touch mine. I looked at him and he was looking at the TV. I wanted to curl up next to him and for him to kiss my head.

"Harry" I whispered very quietly.

"Yes?"

"Can you move your leg?"

"Oh yeah" He moved it and I closed my eyes.

I stood up and he looked at me.

"Where are you going?"

"I just don't want to watch a movie right now"

"Ellie please stay"

I shook my head and he pulled me to his chest. I don't know why but I felt like crying.

"Ellie I want to you with me"

"Harry I just don't feel like doing anything right now"

"No please stay with me"

I laid my head on his shoulder and he held my tight.

"I love you" I heard him say and I kissed his cheek.

"I want to be with you again" He continued and I looked at him.

"I want that"

"So is it official?" He chuckled.

"Is it?"

"Do I get to pick?"

"Yes" I nodded.

"Then yes we are back together" Those words coming out of his mouth sparked something in me I haven't felt in forever.

I smiled and he kissed my lips. I told him I loved him and I saw Niall poke his head around at us. He gave us a thumbs up and I smiled.

Harry held my hands and looked at my wrist. The 'H' tattoo I got so long ago is still there and I looked at his E.

But I soon realized I should stop thinking everything is perfect again.

"Wait Harry" I shook my head and he looked at me.

"What?"

"Can we really do this?"

"Ellie" He breathed into my ear.

"Can we wait a little longer"

"It's so hard to wait"

"I know" I frowned.

"Please let's give this try" He asked and I knew it would end terribly again and I can't go through this anymore.

"I suppose"

"Are you for sure this time?" He held my cheeks and I nodded.

I wasn't sure but I would rather drop the conversation. I want to be with him so badly but I'm terrified. I honestly don't know know what I'm going to do when my heartbreak comes back around but I know I will hurt for a very long time.

(GUYS IM SO SORRY. Spring break starts tomorrow and I really haven't written anything. I had this saved for so long and I should have posted this, they clearly aren't in Japan anymore. Sorry I'm not doing anything this spring break I'll be home alone so I'll post a whole bunch!!!)