Life As A Teasdale

Ch.68

I woke up before my mom did I made sure I did. I knocked on the door that Evan was sleep in and he opened up. I drove him to hai car which was at Phoebes.

"Thank you for driving me home"

"No worries thank you for letting me stay the night"

"No problem"

We said goodbye and I hugged him. I drove back slowly and drove out to where no one really goes. No one knows how much I am hurting. I honestly am tired. I can sleep but it doesn't help. I would love to just leave. Leave as in leave this earth. Not because of Harry. Well some has to do with him but this has always happened to me. He is probably sleeping with her right now. I stopped my car and there was nothing out here. I screamed at the top if my lungs and picked up a rock and threw on the ground. I started to cry and basically throw a fit. I started to walk in circles and pulled out my phone. I called my Phoebe. She's the only one I want to talk to.

"Hello?" She answered I clearly woke her up.

"Phoebe I can't I can't do this"

"What? Ellie what's the matter stop crying what's happening"

"I hate this I hate everyone I honestly hate love I hate life why does someone act like they love me but then lie to me and break my heart?"

"Ellie where are you"

"I don't know but it doesn't matter I just want to tell you I love you so much you are like my sister"

"Ellie what are you doing?"

"I'm outside crying my eyes out try to decide if I want to kill myself or not"

"Ellie calm down where are you?"

"I don't know but I hate this I hate everyone"

I hung up on her and sat down.

I cried as I looked out at a field. I held a ring in my hand. It was Harry's I found it in my car while driving Evan to his car. I rolled it in my hands and picked up my phone. I could either call him or text him. I want to hear his voice. I called him. It rang forever but he finally answered.

"Hello?"

I didn't say anything I was scared to speak.

"Hello?"

"Um Harry?"

"Ellie what are you doing?"

"I- I just want you to know I love you Harry. I love you so much and these past weeks have been beyond hard for me. I think about you every second of every day, I-" I stopped because I was crying to hard to even speak.

"I love you so much I miss you I think of you every time I see a guy walk by I think of how much better you are. I also have been thinking why do I find a guy and it ends wrong? I talked to someone and they said if someone you love so much leaves and moves on and you still need them and they know it and they don't come back then they aren't the one. If they truly love you they will come back. It may take years months but they will come back. I like to believe you will come back in days but I'm wrong aren't I? I know when you said I love you it was real I could tell but when you say I love you now I don't believe. I got rid of all our stuff Lou has it if you want it. I was going to text you this but I don't have the time right now and it's to long. I also want to tell you I have notice you seem a little rude lately. I don't know why I just.... Maybe it's because I'm mad at you I think you are evil? I found one of your rings you must have taken it off and left it in my car. I have it in my hands right now. Right now I'm sitting on a big rock and my feet are hanging over the side. I'm telling you now Harry Styles I'm keeping the ring. I also want to tell you I kissed a guy last night. I didn't feel right after wards. It felt wrong kissing him. But he said if your boyfriend moved on you can too? I know your not my boyfriend anymore I know you still love me I think but I don't think I can date anyone again. I have came to the point where if I date someone they will just break my heart. It's always happened I think it always will happen. When are you coming home? I guess I shouldn't say that because in leaving"

"What do you mean your leaving?" He asked more awake this time.

"I'm leaving for good"

"What? Ellie?"

"No one cares about me. I don't like it here. Earth is more like hell for me because look at me. Oh wait you can't look at me but you know what I mean. I am lonely I am heartbroken. I love you so much Harry. I really do but I'm done. I'm going to let go of it of everything. I'm going to go somewhere

where no one can find me. I'm going to fall just like I fell in love for you. Then I'm going to crash just like I am now. I crashed when you left. See leaving is just like falling in love. Harry you aren't here to help me. You said you would be here for me you would save me but your not. You are far away. Not even close to hear me scream your name"

"No Ellie stop please stay there we need to talk when I get back. Juts go home please don't leave Ellie please"

"No don't come back I am better without you just like you are without me"

"Ellie no stop"

"Bye Harry I love you babe"

I hung up and looked down and started to cry even harder I then heard someone screaming my name and I looked over my shoulder. I saw Phoebe running towards me and she was running fast. She pulled my into a hug and was crying. I wrapped my arms around her and cried even harder.

"Ellie what are you doing?"

"I'm leaving this place I'm going to leave everything and go somewhere where no one knows me and I can be fine" I cried into her arms and I saw my moms car pull up. I saw my father and mother come near me. My head was killing me and I blacked out.