Life As A Teasdale

Ch.149

I spent the entire day with Stella and Max. I've tried to call Phoebe today but she didn't even answer. I'm giving up on trying to reach out to her and see what even happened. We haven't spoken since Halloween. That's months and we are suppose to be best friends. I had dinner with Max because my parents are out having dinner with someone. Stella had to go to her cousins birthday dinner.

I drove back home and played music off my phone and changed every one that reminded me of Harry. I'm trying to clear what happened yesterday. It wasn't bad it jut made me miss him.

I pulled into my driveway and walked to the front door. someone stood up and I got scared.

"Sorry didn't mean to scare you" Harry laughed and I grabbed my chest.

"Stop doing that" I laughed and he chuckled.

"Sorry"

"What are you doing here?"

"Um.. You left your scarf at Lou's and I thought I would just bring it over"

"Oh thank you" I took it out of his hands and it became awkwardly silent.

"Um ca-" He began.

"You want to come in?" I asks and he nodded.

"If that's fine"

"Of course it is Harry. We are still best friends" I pulled him into my house and he set his phone down.

"Where is everyone?"

"My parents are at some dinner with some people for something"

"Like always?"

"Yes" I smiled and he sat down.

"How have you been?" He asked and I looked at him.

I tried to fight back tears because I really do miss being in his arms.

"I've been good"

"Really?"

"Yes and no"

"How about you?" I changed the conversation.

"I've been good. It's been a little busy but good"

"Aren't you going to Sweden tomorrow?"

"Yes. And if you are still interested in coming you still have a seat" I laughed.

"Harry I can't"

"Why?"

"I'm busy myself"

"Okay" He looked away and I rubbed my face.

"Ellie" He whispered and I looked at him.

"Yeah?"

"If you want to cry you can" He smiled sweetly and I laughed.

"Im tired of crying" I spoke and right as I did a tear fell from my eye.

"You may be tired but you still have tears to cry" He reached over and whipped it away.

"Harry I'm trying to heal from what happened between us and it's hard and tiring"

"I know it's hard. I am feelings the same way not getting to be with you anymore"

"I think we have forgotten how to be friends without being in a relationship"

"If that makes since" I whipped away more tears.

"It 100 percent makes since to me"

"I just feel like I can't even touch you or say how I'm feeling"

"Why" He scooted closer and I shook my head.

"Without us together I feel out of place. You did make me a whole person. This may sound stupid but it's all the truth. I loved you so fucking much. So damn much it hurt me so bad I had to leave"

He pulled me onto his lap and I cried into his chest and he kissed my cheek. I held on so tight to him as if I would lose him.

"You will never lose me even if you move on I will always be here for you" He said into my ear and I looked at him.

"I don't think I could even move on. This is going to sound selfish but I don't want you to move on either"

He laughed and I leaned in to his lips.

"Ellie is Harry here?" My dad yelled and I pulled away and got off of him.

"Um yeah we are in here" I yelled and he looked at me.

My dad walked in and Harry stood up.

"How have you been?" They hugged each other and my mum smiled at me and walked away.

"I've been great" He answered and my father walked out.

"I'm sorry" I said and he shook his head.

"I wish you would have done it anyways"

"It would have been a bad thing"

"Not to me it wouldn't" I laughed and walked him to his car.

"I hope you can come with us. Text me tomorrow if you change your mind and I'll be right here to get you"

"I'll think about it" I said and he pulled me into a hug.

"I love you Ellie"

"I love you too Harry"

"I'll see you super soon" He hugged me for a long time and it was nice.

"Bye" I waved and walked into the house.

I'm trying to figure out what would have happened if I kissed him and my parents didn't come in. Would we still be doing something we shouldn't. Or would I stop and say I was wrong to do this.