I'm Not Fine At All

Chapter 12

The lanky, curly-haired boy laid in his bed, trying to think up ideas for his and Niall's friendship anniversary. They had been best friends for a whole ten years and they had both decided to have their own little anniversary party. Harry would have been having a great deal of success with coming up with ideas, had it not been for the loud banging coming from the other side of his wall. The poor boy was getting a headache from the constant cacophony, and he really needed to buy something for Niall by the end of the week. He finally gave up, slamming his notebook down on the bed before storming out of the room and bursting into Liam's room.

"Liam, would you stop with that- Oh my fucking god!" The source of the noise turned out to not be his brother but Louis, his new flatmate, who was in bed with some guy Harry had never seen before. "Harry! I didn't know you were home!" Louis quickly got off of the smaller guy splayed out on the bed and covered himself up with a sheet. "Look, kid, can you please leave. Just for a minute, okay? We'll be done in just a sec, I promise." The boy nodded numbly and backed out of the room, shutting the door quietly behind him.

Harry slowly slid down the wall until he was seated on the floor, hugging his knees to his chest as he waited for Louis and his friend to finish up. He didn't have to wait long, though. Only a few minutes later Louis and the small boy came out of Liam's room, both pink-cheeked, the small one walking with a slight limp. "Haz?" Harry looked up at the sound of his name being spoken by a soft, raspy voice. An angelic Louis stood above him in just a pair of too-tight joggers, a light sheen of sweat coating his still heaving, but incredibly chiseled, chest. Harry felt his heart rate pick up just at the sight. Louis whispered something into the other guy's ear and he waved goodbye, leaving the two boys alone.

Louis wrung his hands, fidgeting uncomfortably after the boy left. "Look...I'm really sorry, Haz. We didn't know you were home. Li told me that I could use his room if I needed to for, ya know, stuff, but he made me promise not to do it while you were still at home. I guess I'm getting that privilege taken away," The boy mumbled grumpily under his breath. "Sorry you had to see that. And hear it. Is there anything I can do to make it up to you?" Louis crouched down in front of the younger boy so that he could be at his level. Harry nodded at him. "Could you come shopping with me? Li doesn't like me to go too far from the apartment on my own. I just need to go downtown to pick up a few things."

Louis smiled and winked at the blushing boy. "Of course, love. Just let me put a shirt on and grab my keys." Harry stopped him with a hand on his wrist. "No." He shook his head fearfully. "No cars." Louis's heart dropped at the shakiness of Harry's voice and he suddenly remembered why the boy was there in the first place. "Of course not. I'm so sorry, love, I completely forgot." The older boy smacked his forehead with his palm and ran back into the bedroom, slipping a shirt on before coming back out. The younger lad smiled sadly and held his arms out. "Help me up?" He asked. Louis looked at the boy fondly and grabbed his hands, pulling him to his feet. "C'mon, darling. Let's go shopping."

The two boys were met with a blast of humid air when Louis opened the door of the lobby. The older lad immediately regretted wearing joggers and a long-sleeved t-shirt, already feeling himself begin to sweat, but Harry was perfectly dressed in a cropped band t-shirt and red shorts. Louis definitely did not take an extra-long look at Harry's bum in those shorts, though. Of course not. His eyes just accidentally grazed over the boy's bum when he opened the door for him.

"Where to, darling?" Louis spoke into the boy's ear, trying to be heard over the afternoon traffic. "Spencer's," The boy whispered shyly. "What?" Louis asked as he pinched Harry's side lightly, making the boy let out a small squeak. "Umm, Spencer's, please? At the mall?" He turned to look up at the older boy. The boy wasn't that much taller than him, but he was bigger. Curvier and more muscular in places where Harry's body hadn't even begun developing yet. Harry glanced self-consciously down at his long chicken legs and orangutan arms. He felt like he was still a child. "Sure, love. You don't have to ask, just tell me where you want to go and I'll follow. You're the leader here."

Louis picked up the pace then, tugging on Harry's arm as he pulled him down the sidewalk. The mall was just a few blocks away and Louis wanted to get there quickly before Liam came back home and saw they were gone. He still wasn't exactly clear on all of the rules that Liam had set up for him about the Harry situation. Of course he loved hanging out with the cherub-faced boy. Who couldn't? He was absolutely adorable. But Louis knew that betraying his friend's trust was the worst thing he could do, especially when Liam was being nice enough to let him live at his apartment without even having to pay rent.

The boys arrived, sweaty and out of breath, at the mall only a few minutes later. Both of them sighed in relief when they felt the air-conditioning blast them in the face at the entrance. Harry tugged a little on Louis's arm, grabbing his attention from a display at the music store. "Umm, Spencer's is down there." He pointed at the graffitied storefront a few stores down. "C-can I go?" Louis grinned and nodded, letting go of the boy's arm so he could walk to the store. "Meet me back here when you're done. Try not to take too long, don't want Liam to get worried."

Harry gave the older boy a thumbs-up and skipped off. Louis watched him with a stupid grin, a soft look on his face. He shook his head, embarrassed by the things he was thinking about his best friend's brother, and went into the music store to look at guitars until Harry came back. There was a great black and white Mosrite that had caught his eye in the window. It looked almost identical to the one Johnny Ramone played during his days in the Ramones and Louis needed to get a closer look at it.

Ten minutes passed and Harry came into the store, a Spencer's bag clutched in his left hand and his cheeks pink from all of the dirty things he had seen in the store. His eyes wandered around the shop until he finally settled them on Louis, who he saw examining some guitar that was displayed in the window case. "Hey, Lou." The boy startled and bumped his head into the cymbal on the drum kit next to him. "Ow, shit. Geez, Haz, don't sneak up on people like that." Harry giggled and rocked back on his heels. "Sorry, Lou-Lou. But I needed to get your attention. I'm all done." He held up his bag with a proud grin on his face. "Let me see." Harry shook his head, holding the bag higher.

Before Harry could stop him, Louis yanked the bag out of his hand, breath hitching when he saw what was inside. "Y-you...Harry, this is a-a dildo. What the fuck do you need this for?" Harry opened his mouth to answer but was stopped by Louis's hand in his face. "N-no, don't answer that question. I know what this is for. Let's just go home." Louis held his arm out, gesturing for Harry to go in front of him, and the pair left the store. "Just so you know, Louis, the dildo isn't for me. It's for Niall. I got it for him as an anniversary present."

Louis choked on his spit at the boy's bold statement. "Jesus, Harry! I don't want to hear about you and Niall's kinky-ass relationship. Fuck!" He covered his ears in disgust, shifting further away from the boy next to him. Harry sighed and tugged the older boy's hands away from his head. "We're not together, Louis. It's our friendship anniversary. We've been friends for ten years so we're celebrating it with our own little thing. Niall planned a dinner out at this fancy restaurant and then we're gonna come back to Li's place to watch movies all night. It's gonna be the best."

Louis sighed, glad that Harry and Niall weren't together. He wasn't sure why he was upset at the thought of Harry being with someone, he just was. Maybe he was just being protective of the boy in a brotherly way. Yeah, that's it. He didn't have feelings for him, he was just treating him like a brother. No feelings there at all.