Voodoo Doll

Chapter 120

Bella

I lay awake in my bed, staring into the darkness.

My arms are stretched out around me, my legs awkwardly, yet comfortably, bent.

I want to grab my phone, and go back on Instagram or Twitter and see how the fans really feel about me.

But I will myself not to, because I know i will break if I do.

I let out a deep breath through my nose, rub my eyes and sit up.

Slipping on my TOMS, I force a slight smile on my face as I grab my room key and carefully slip out into the hallway.

I lean against the door and sigh, and a real smile comes across my face as I realize I forgot my phone back in the room.

At least now I really can't read the tweets, so I don't have to resist the urge to read the hurtful words.

I tiptoe down the long hall, and step into the elevator. I smile as I notice they have a button that raises me to the roof.

As I arrive at my destination, I have to climb a flight of stairs and push through a large, heavy door before I'm on the roof.

The cold air whips my long hair around me, and I gasp as i see the breath-taking view of the city before me. I'm not sure where we are, but it's beautiful.

I shiver as the cold stings my cheeks and fingers, and I shove my hands into the pockets of my baggy sweatpants. Sitting down on the ledge, I bring my knees to my chest and wrap my arms around them, huddling for warmth.

I know this is dangerous, and it's freezing up here. But it clears my head and I need that.

I hear honking of cars below, what are people doing up at 1 AM? I breathe in deeply, a smile once again spreading across my face as I stand up and stick my arms out, loving the free feeling i got.

My eyes are close, my balance is steady, and I feel as if I have no boundaries.

And I'm away from those horrible cyber bullies. The horrible cyber bullies who are right about me.

And all at once, everything comes crashing back down and reality gives me a nice hard slap in the face.

It could be so easy...all I have to do is let myself fall. It would be quick and over with...I would be away from everything finally. No more pain, no more broken hearts.

But also no more Carson, or Zayn or Sam, no more Bell, Anna or 5SOS, or the rest of 1D.

Those are things and people keeping me on this ledge.

Biting my lip, I look down at the brightly lit street, and I feel myself wobble, my arms pinwheeling to regain balance and catch myself.

"Bella! Be careful!" I hear someone running towards me, their feet slapping the hard stone of the roof.

I turn to quickly, loosing my balance as I see Zayn reach me. My arms fly out, and Zayn leaps forward just in time to grab my hand, and yanks me to him.

I'm shaking as he holds me close, and a small sob escapes me. We're pressed against each other, partially for warmth and because of the event that just occurred.

"It's okay," Zayn murmurs as he holds me against him with one arm hooked around my waist, the other stroking my hair.

"Thank you," I whisper, looking up at him. "Thank you so much."

He gives me the slightest of smiles. "No problem, I'm sorry for scaring you. Are you all right?"

I nod, my heart still pounding in my chest, blood rushing in my ears. My hands clench at my sides as I will myself not to cry and fall apart.