DS #1: Caught by the Demon's Arms [COMPLETED]

Kabanata 27

ERRORS AHEAD

-
-
Sometimes the truth will not set us free, sometimes it will hurt us the most.

No one knows how painful the situation I am suffering right now. No one does.

The fact that I still love him even he's not here, anymore. I thought I'd moved on, because my mind were occupied with the crime I've caused to the people. But I was wrong, he's still here, inside my heart.

Hindi nagbago, nagtatago lang siya sa puso ko kaya hindi ko maibigay ang hinihingi ni Jolo.

Jolo's confessing his love for me, but I can't feel him. so I tried to explain to him that I don't entertain some suitor for awhile.

"Mi lady, I know it's makes you uncomfortable but I want to tell you that.." umayos siya ng upo habang namumula ang kaniyang pisnge. "I love you."

Tinext niya ako kahapon na magkita daw kami ngayon dahil ngayon lang ang free day niya. Sinabi rin niya na importante ang sasabihin niya kaya hindi na ako nakatanggi kahit na may usapan na kami ni Thalie na magkikita ngayon.

This passed few weeks, He always bought flower for me or sending snacks with sweet notes in my school, minsan nga magugulat nalang ako at may iaabot saakin ang mga ka-blockmates ko at makikita ko na galing pala sakaniya iyon. He always makes me feel at home when he's around. He filled the hole in my system.

I thought it was just a friendly concern but I was wrong again.

I took a deep sighed and looked at his eyes.

"Jolo, I-I'm sorry. But I... can't. My heart is still r-recovering from those wounds I g-gained. at isa pa, we're friends for along time." Pumyok ang boses na sabi ko.

I know he's serious this time. Hindi siya nagbibiro tungkol sa ganitong bagay. Natahimik siya at ang saya ng mga mata niya ay biglang napalitan ng sakit.

Ngumiti siya ng tipid at huminga ng malalim.

Umiwas ako ng tingin sakaniya, dahil sa tuwing nakikita ko ang mga mata niya feeling ko lalo ko lang siyang masasaktan.

"Until now, I'm still in the process of fixing my heart. I just want to apologize for ignoring and rejecting your existence. Maybe someday, my door is willingly to open for someone. but for now, I choose myself to heal first." I said while staring at my coffee.

I can't stand seeing him this broken!

The beats of my heart was giving an unbearable pain. Kaibigan ko siya kaya ko ginagawa ito. Ayokong umasa siya sa wala. Ayokong saktan pa siya.

"He was never really gone, was he? You just hid him. You kept him safe inside your heart. Not visible enough for me to see, but quite reachable for you to still feel his presence despite his absence in your life. That's why, You can't even open your heart for me, because he's still there, you have loved him, and it never stops. I could see it through your eyes." nanginginig na boses na sabi niya, tila pinipigilan ang emosyon.

I gulped to put a moist in my throat.

"It's up to you if you'll choose to stay. I will not give you hope, anyway. As for now it's worthwhile to choose myself—"

He laughed, a painful laughed. My heart crumpled like a piece of paper. And the moment our eyes met, my heart ache. The way he look at me, is like He's talking to my soul, Begging for his chances.

"I was there in your darkest times when he left you. I filled your empty cups, when you're drained and broken. Binuo kita e... binuo kita noong mga panahong sinira ka niya. but in the end you are the one who break me... I-into shattered p-pieces." Parang nilamukos ang puso ko ng makitang dahan-dahang nahuhulog ang mga luha niya.

Hindi. Mali ka, Jolo. Hindi mo 'ko nabuo—Hindi, hindi ko pala hinayaang buuin mo ako dahil ayaw kong mabuo. dahil hanggang ngayon, umaasa parin ako na malay mo balang araw, bumalik siya.

"Ngayon ko napag-tanto na masarap mag-assume pero mahirap masaktan." Bulong niya habang nanatili akong nakayuko habang pigil-pigil ang emosyon.

Pinagtitinginan na kami sa loob ng caffeé pero tila wala nang pakealam si Jolo at patuloy parin niyang sinasaktan ang sarili niya at ako.

Ayoko sanang umabot kami sa puntong masira ang pagkakaibigan namin dahil lang mas pinili ko ang pagkakaibigan kaysa sa inaalok niya na higit pa roon.

"I saved you from being a broken one but who saves me then? P-paano naman ako, Jenny?" Tuluyan ng nahulog ang luha ko, humagulgol ako.

Umiling ako hindi na makapag-salita.

In life, there's expectations and there's reality. That's not how reality works. You never enjoy anything because you're always waiting for something happen, that something would probably never even happen. There's no sparks, no magic, no nothing.

Pinunasan niya ang luha niya at umayos ng upo at tinignan akong muli. Kinuha niya ang kaniyang panyo at inabot ang mukha ko at siya na mismo ang nagpunas sa luha ko.

"Just look into my eyes and tell me you don't love me, and I will not make this hard for you." Aniya.

My lips parted.

"Hurt me more, Jenny. I want to he dense this time. Please... hurt me by your words. Tell me.." ngumiti siya ng mapait habang nasa mukha ko parin ang kamay niya.

I look at his eyes. His eyes was full of words that he wanted to say. But my gaze caught by someone standing outside at the caffeé.

Out of all men here in this four corners, nahanap siya ng mga mata ko.

His pair of dark eyes was on mine, and the way he look at me is makes my heart fluttered.

And my world literally stops when he smirks at me.