PSYCHE-KSJ•JHS✔️

|72|

|JANIA|
30 weeks, 3 days

How did I get to this point? How did we get here? Why am I getting a sense of deja vu? Like we've been here before. Like this has happened before.

Well, it has. Many times before. Just not in this specific situation. Not this way.

Waking up to Hoseok has happened more times than I can count on one hand. The differences between those times and this time is the amount of caution being displayed.

Hoseok's legs are intertwined with mine as we lie on our sides facing each other. His right arm is under his head as he lays on it and his left is rubbing my hip.

We've been awake for only a couple minutes, doing nothing but looking at each other. He's so... soft when he wakes up in the morning. His hair always fluffed out. His skin is warm and smells like his signature scent.

I think that he's used Dior cologne so much that it's bonded itself to his skin or something. He smells like himself but very subtly of the mens cologne though I know that he hasn't used it.

His thick, dark lashes bat at me as he blinks. He licks his lips and chews on the bottom one. This is something that he only does when he's nervous or thinking too hard about things.

He takes a deep breath through his nose and looks down at my lips. He swallows thickly and I feel my heartbeat pick up.

"Move in with me?"

He asks quietly, as if he doesn't want to use his voice but I still hear him anyway. I don't react, kind of stunned that he asked. It's not something that I was expecting. He told me that I didn't have to.

"I know you don't want to.. and you definitely don't have to.. I just think it'd be easier for you. Well, the both of us. I don't mind coming to your house but you said that you don't want to be stuck there. And I don't want to take you in and out the house while it's cold. What if you get sick? We've got enough going on and they just took you off the progesterone a couple weeks ago. You've got the hypertension to watch. It'd be easier for me to take care of you here."

I think about his words and hesitate. The first that pops into my head is no. How can he take care of me that way when he didn't before. But I know that this isn't about me. It's not for me. Ultimately, it's about Mina. And no matter how much I'd like to believe that I can do it on my own, I cannot. Especially not with what the doctor said.

"To take care of me or to watch me?" I ask as I put my hand on my stomach. I'm met with his hand that I hadn't realized moved there.

Hoseok opens his mouth and I watch the gears in his mind turn. Only one of his eyebrows twitch but they furrow together. It's not a deep dip into his face but it's enough for me to see it.

"A little of both... definitely both." He admits as he stares at my chest.

I assume he's staring at the necklace that I have yet to take off. I didn't want to. It didn't feel right.

"I'm gonna take care of you regardless but I'd feel... a lot better if you were here." He rubs my hip and waist. His Adam's apple bobs as he swallows.

"That day I brought it up, I was going to tell you that I'd stay with you."

His stare move from the necklace to my eyes. ".. stay where? Here? After she's born?"

"Mhm. Just for the three months." I clarify. He bites the inside of his lip and nods.

"Okay. So from now until she's three months." He confirms. "That's five and half months total."

"That isn't going to be too long for you, is it?"