PSYCHE-KSJ•JHS✔️

|102|

|THIRD|

Jania looks at herself in the mirror, staring at her baby bump. At this point into her gestational period, it's obvious that she's pregnant.

She remembers being so worried about her baby bump with Mina. She remembers being so happy about it and so proud of it. Yet so nervous about how or if she'd snap back.

So much time has passed since then. She did snap back but in a different way than she expected. She hadn't thought about her body being different than it was before.

When people refer to 'snapping back', they're often talking about women losing their baby weight quickly. They're often talking about women getting thin. And usually, it's in a certain amount of time.

Jania didn't go back to her pre-pregnancy weight. And she's perfectly content with that. It's a change but she's learned to love the body that her child gave her. She sees no flaws and has no insecurities with this weight. She's comfortable with it.

Perfectly comfortable. So much so, that now she worries about getting bigger or 'snapping back': Her current pregnancy is going well and she's gaining the proper weight in a healthy way. But she doesn't want to be any bigger than what she was before she got pregnant.

That's where she's most comfortable at. It's where she wants to stay.

"You okay, mama?" Hoseok walks into the bedroom with his towel wrapped around his waist, pushing his wet hair back. He pushes the door so that it's cracked open.

Mina's awake but she's playing on her room. She's been crawling and getting into just about everything. But honestly, what could they expect? She's nine months and a very active, curious child.

"Yeah." Jania says quietly as she rubs her stomach in the mirror. She turns sideways to looks at it and bites the inside of her cheek.

"I don't want to get any bigger." She says honestly. Hoseok raises an eyebrow and blinks at her. He looks from her stomach to her face as his lips slowly poke out.

"...you're only five months, baby. You kinda have to." He says, being very careful of what he says and how he says it. "Our baby's not anywhere near finished growing yet. They've still got a while to bake."

"No, I mean me. After. I don't want to be bigger than I was before I got pregnant again." She expresses her thoughts as she looks at him. "I liked my body like that."

Hoseok's eyes soften as he starts to dry off. "You're worried about your post-baby weight?"

"Yes."

"Don't be, Jah. At least not right now. I don't want you to feel like you can't indulge in things."

"But I want to maintain my weight. Not clock it but just stay in a healthy zone so that when I do have the baby and I'm healed, it'll be easier to get back to the weight that I like."

He looks at me skeptically and nervously.

"I promise that it's not coming from a place of insecurity, Hobi. I really do just like the weight that I was at and want to stay there."

"Okay. We can look some stuff to find healthy fats. We can stay away from eating out as much this time around unless you crave your milkshakes and Lonzo's mom's cornbread. I'll look some stuff up to meal plan you. Maybe we can talk to the nutritionist at your doctor's office, too. See if she can help."

He puts his boxers on and kisses his fiancé's cheek before starting to lotion his body.

"Okay. I'll call and ask for an appointment with her. I want to be able to actually fit into my wedding dress."