Secrets | Woosan

47

"How is he?" Yeosang asked frantically as he finally found San after wandering through every hospital floor.

San looked up at him with wide eyes, "how did you—"

"Yunho called me and told me something happened."

Although Yeosang had never been more worried in his life about his best friend, he couldn't help but notice how broken San seemed to be. Besides the younger's own disheveled dress shirt being covered in blood that wasn't his own, his face was very noticeably red and swollen from crying.

"Wooyoung he—he's in surgery...I don't know what's going to happen, Yeosang, it wasn't...it wasn't good," San rambled, tears blurring his vision once again.

Instead of having to cry into his hands once again of from the mixture of worry, guilt, and grief he possessed, Yeosang wrapped his arms around San. However strange the circumstances were, San didn't have it in him to pretend like he was okay. He wasn't. Not only did it turn out that his best friend was never truly a friend—but that same man tried to kill his boyfriend...and might have.

Six months ago, San would've rolled on the floor laughing if somebody told him one day Yeosang would hold him while he cried harder than he'd ever cried before—but that's exactly what happened as they stood in the waiting room.

Yeosang just stood there for what felt like hours, rubbing San's back as he sobbed. He was worried himself and wanted to know what was going on, but San wouldn't have been able to form real words at that moment anyway. On top of having to see Wooyoung hurt and bringing him here, it was nearly four in the morning so he must have been beyond exhausted both mentally and physically.

"I'm sorry..." San whispered at last, composing himself in the slightest as he pulled away from Yeosang, "You're here for Wooyoung not to watch me cry."

"I can do both," Yeosang joked softly, trying to lighten the mood just a little bit.

Clearing his throat, San tried to will himself to explain what was happening without breaking down again. "So...he got shot in the stomach and the bullet couldn't come out on the other side, obviously, so he's in surgery right now to get the bullet out and stitch him up. The bullet didn't hit any organs that they could see...but it is awfully close to his spine so...so there's that," he whispered the last three words, feeling himself tear up once again.

✨✨✨

After waiting hours upon hours to hear from anybody, San and Yeosang slowly dozed off to sleep next to each other on the uncomfortable waiting room chairs.

"Mr Choi..." a nurse whispered as she reached out to hesitantly poke the sleeping man's shoulder.

Jolting awake, and seeing the nurse in front of him, he practically jumped out of the chair. "Is the surgery done? How is Wooyoung?"

"He just woke up, surgery went well. There hasn't been any complications."

"Can I go see him?" San asked eagerly.

Sending him a sweet smile, the nurse nodded, "of course, I can take you to his room.

San glanced back at Yeosang who was awake now too. The elder waved it off, "You go first San, don't worry about me."

He nodded, quickly turning to follow the woman to Wooyoung's room. "Here you are, Mr Choi. There are going to be people in and out to check things, don't be alarmed, it's completely normal."

After thanking the nurse, San took a deep breath before walking into the room. He saw Wooyoung laying on the white hospital bed, propped up by a few pillows and watching a movie. "I'd hate to see the other guy..." Wooyoung mumbled as he glanced over and saw San's bloodstained shirt still tucked into his slacks as if he was ready to return to work just after this.

Laughing the fact that was the first thing he said, San softly added, "You're the other guy, Wooyoung."

"Oh..." a small pout formed on Wooyoung's pale lips before he patted an empty spot next to him on the bed, "sit by me, Sannie?"

Doing as he asked, San carefully sat down, mindful not sit where he could hurt the boy. He reached out and brushed the hair off of Wooyoung's forehead, looking at the cut that had scabbed over by now.

"Can you hold my hand?" Wooyoung asked, wiggling the fingers on the hand laying next to San. He hadn't lost any sort of mobility from the surgery, but one thing he had lost was any sort of energy. All he seemed to be able to do was talk, breathe, and blink, the rest was too much for him.

San grabbed the Wooyoung's hand, rubbing his fingers over the boy's soft knuckles. The longer he sat there looking at his boyfriend, the more intense the guilt consuming him was. He sat there in silence until he couldn't keep himself from crying any long.

"I'm sorry," he whispered, quickly turning his head so Wooyoung couldn't see him.

"Sannie..." Wooyoung started, squeezing his finger around the elder's hand as best he could, "why are you so upset? I'm okay."

Looking at the ceiling, San let out a harsh breath, trying to will the tears to stop. "This is my fault," he spoke at last, "You almost got killed because of me—and you still got shot. I'm sorry, Wooyoung, this is all because of me—I'm so sorry."

"Hey—Choi San look at me," Wooyoung ordered harshly, "in my eyes," he urged when San turned only to look down at the bedsheets. "Youre not the one that decides who lives and dies, San. It's not your responsibility. I'm okay, San, I'm going to be fine. I'm fine but I'm just going to have a cool scar now."

"Wooyoung."

"Ok ok I'll give it a week until I joke about getting shot."

"I...I can't help but to think that us...this would be better for you if we weren't together. You wouldn't even have to think about this kind of stuff happening if you were dating...literally anybody else in the world."

Wooyoung raised an eyebrow at his words, "San, do you love me?"

"Of course I love you."

"Then why does it matter? I could go anywhere and find some boring guy, but I'll never love them like I love you."

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