The Words I Speak

I'm Always Waiting For Disaster

I wanna forgive you

Why is it so hard to forgive you

It's your actions that lead to this

Your words that are engraved on my skin

I've been in survival mode for so long

I don't know a way out or how to be relaxed
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I'm always waiting for disaster
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Unexpected changes at every corner

The moment I get comfortable it twists

I fall into a dark loop hole everytime

I close one you open another, never-ending

You did this to yourself and it hurts everyone

You believed you're enduring all this mess
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I'm always waiting for disaster
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I tried every other point of view

To try to understand you

I can't, with the memories you refuse to forget

There's no space for the ones I'd like to keep

I try to flip the glass to empty it

But you overflow it even more than I can take
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I'm always waiting for disaster
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You tend to take things out of proportion

It's miserable, how are you even living

I have no choice but to unfold the buried

Because you refused to process and deal

You left your body and went to live in gardenia

You're a wounded child never knew how to heal
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I'm always waiting for disaster