The Break Up Freak

Chapter 44

I looked at her silently. There seemed to be a battle going on within her. "Eyes." She whispered. 

"Whose eyes?" I asked. 

"Mine?" She looked at me and at that moment I would have given her the whole universe.  "What does this mean?" She asked unsure. 

I reached out and held her hands in mine, "The first time we met, at your office." I started...

"You were furious." She gave a laugh.

"Furiously in awe," I smiled. "I was about to end that meeting before you came in, and then you came to sit opposite me. I couldn't believe the effect you had on me in just those few seconds. You are a beautiful woman, Leticia, but what captured my soul that day were your eyes." 

"How?" She asked.

"I was going to cancel the merger when I found out there was a woman partner," she glared at me, "I haven't finished love, but that moment our eyes clashed, I wanted to stay. I wanted to get to know you, there was something more than you were letting on." 

"I'm not hiding anything if that's what you mean." She defended herself. 

"Yes. You are." I looked at her. "Deep inside you want there to be someone you can depend on, lean on, trust completely, but as far as you know, no body has ever reached that criteria." 

"What are you talking about?" Her hands were shaking, she looked everywhere but at me. 

"I don't want you to completely trust me, but I want you to learn to trust me slowly." She suddenly stood up and I followed her, my heart beating so fast. 

"You're asking too much," She crossed her arms over her. Shield, she was shielding herself. That's the only barrier I had to break. I pulled her into me and held her to myself without saying a word. I felt her body stiffen against me, not uncrossing her hands. 

"It's alright," I broke the silence but not the contact, "I'm not pushing you, love. Take your time." 

We stayed like that, not saying anything, slowly I felt it. Her body was starting to relax. 

*****************

I wanted to run away, to curl down on my couch and enjoy the darkness and silence for a while. How did he describe my inner secrets that I wasn't sure of myself so well? Yes, I cherished Break Ups, because that is the only thing I felt that made me feel something. 

I knew no one lived happily forever, no one can convince me about that. But had this notion really hindered my happiness all this time? Was it true I can truly be happy with someone without thinking of the future misfortunes? 

Minerva and Stella said I needed to live in the Now, but wasn't that stupid? What about tomorrow? What happens when someone you have decided to trust wholeheartedly just up and leaves? 

For example, this man holding me, well his wife might not have broken up with him, but she had left, hadn't she? 

How does anyone go through that kind of pain? loss? I don't know if I can. Just thinking of it only makes me resist this even more. I shook my head fiercely and crossed my hands over me even tighter. No one was going to convince me.

"It's alright," he whispered, "I'm not pushing you, love. Take your time." The fact that he had put it out there meant he wanted me to trust him. But how? 

'Live in the Now, Live in the Now.' Minerva's voice rang in my head and I slowly moved, unfolding my hands and slowly letting them circle his waist. I felt his body relax as he gave a sigh and pulled me even closer to him.

"Thank you." I heard him whisper as he dropped kisses on my head. This made me realize how short I was and I suddenly chuckled. "What's so funny?" He asked lifting my chin with his pointer finger to look at him.

"Just." I shrugged, "By the way, where did you learn to draw so well?" 

"Hmm," he pretended to think and shrugged. 

"C'mon, tell me." I shook him sideways and he laughed. 

"I need to be paid to tell you." he said making me gasp.

"How much?" He lifted three fingers in the air, "Three Euros?" I grinned and he shook his head, "Three hundred?" still shook his head, "Three thousand?" I asked ridiculously but he still shook his head, "Hey, don't over do it, Three million?" 

"Why should all payments be monetary, you think?" he asked moving his face closer to mine, "Use your brain, think." He said moving even closer to me. I squinted my eyes at him then gasped. He smiled and nodded his head. 

"You're such a kid." I said, "Alright." I leant up and gave him three fast kisses on his cheek, "There you go now spill." 

"I didn't like that kind of fast payment Miss," He complained, "It has to be done on my terms." I scowled at him but he continued, "One kiss here," he touched his left cheek, then his right cheek, "another here, and the last one that will determine if I'll tell you or not, here." he lastly touched his mouth and leaned in even closer. 

I looked at him for sometime and went on my tiptoes, slowly kissing both his cheeks and lastly his lips. He deepened the kiss the moment I touched his lips making me gasp as his hands moved from my shoulders to my waist. I leant into him on my toes and encircled his neck with my hands as I kissed him back with as much passion as he was using. 

Minutes later we broke apart and stared at each other then chuckled. "Right, were was I?" he asked.

"Art, Drawing, sounds familiar?" I joked. 

"Uh, yes, that one." he led me back to the couch and settled next to me. "Well, I've always made the sketches for our hotels."

"You're an Architect?" I asked surprised.

"Since I now hire someone else to do that job for me, not anymore I guess." He shrugged. Amazing. 

"How did your wife die?" I suddenly asked and sensed him freeze, "You don't have to tell me." I added quickly.

"It's alright," he smiled, "It's been three years. She was rushing back home from her office because I was mad at her for leaving Bella at home when she was just a few months old." He paused, "I still have nightmares about that day. I should have waited instead of rushing her to get back." 

"Sad, to hear it." I said

"Well, it's been years now. It's alright." he shrugged. 

"About your nightmares. Is that why you like to leave the lights on?" I suddenly asked and he suddenly laughed. 

"About that." he winced, "I sleep with lights on in unfamiliar settings." 

"Why?" I asked.

"Because I want to know where I am when I wake up or where my things are." 

"So, you were just being a jerk about the lights thing." I wondered loudly to myself. 

"Hey, I heard that." He said shoving me with his shoulder.

"You were meant to hear that Mr. Jerk." I retorted causing him to start tickling me. 

"Apologize for that Miss Powers." 

"Okay, Okay, Sorry but really..." 

"Apology accepted," he said leaning forward and kissing me fully on the mouth. 

I didn't object. Right Here, Right Now, I felt really Happy. Live in the Now. Boy was I glad to hear Minerva's voice for the first time.