Stand In Dad

Sinking

TW: mentioned blood, suicidal thoughts!!!

Midoriya's POV:

I woke up to find my sheets folded, and placed on the other bed.

All Might was in here...

Oh shit! All Might was in here!!!

What if he saw the shirt?! Or the bed?! What if he called my mom, and she told him that I don't get nosebleeds?!

I did my best to calm myself down, before making my way out of the room. I found All Might in the kitchen, making toast.

"Ah, young Midoriya. You're awake. Would you like one peice of toast, or two?"

"Uh... ones fine..."

He gave me a smile, and continued what he was doing.

We sat in silence for a minute, before All Might spoke. His tone sounded concerned.

"Midoriya... did you get another nosebleed? There was more blood on the shirt..."

"Yeah."

Lying was getting easier. I was able to speak without my voice rising in pitch. And I said it with a completely neutral face.

"Okay... if you get another one, do you think you could tell me? I'm just getting a bit concerned at the number of nosebleeds you're getting."

"Sure."

I said, pulling out my phone as an excuse to stop talking.

Still no response from Kacchan...

After a few minutes, All Might placed a plate with toast in front of me.

"You want anything on it? Egg, avocado, jam? Not together of course. Except maybe the first two..."

"Jam."

I wasn't all that hungry... I hadn't been for the past few days... and eggs and avocado felt too... just too much...

All Might slid a jar of jam over to me. Butter following close behind.

I put butter, and jam on my toast, happy that All Might wasn't commenting on my lack of apatite.

"Aizawa's gonna be coming over in the next few days. So you'll probably be able to see young Bakugou."

"Wait really?!"

I couldn't help but let the excitement slip into my voice.

"Yes, he called yesterday."

"Why didn't you tell me yesterday?"

"Because you locked yourself in your room, after getting really mouthy. And I didn't think you wanted to be bothered."

He seemed a combination of amused, and annoyed.

Fair... I was... a bit difficult to talk to in that moment.

"Do you know what day?"

"No... he didn't say. Just within the next few days."

I nodded, continuing to eat my toast.

We sat quietly, and it was clear that All Might was working up to saying something.

"Young Midoriya... don't you think that we should call your mom about all these nosebleeds?"

I chocked on my toast, spitting the bite onto my plate.

"Why would you need to do that?!"

"Because your mom should know about what's happening. It's honestly concerning how much blood was on that t-shirt."

"This just happens sometimes, no need to bother her with it."

"I don't think it would bother her. She'd want to know about what's happening."

"She's on vacation. I don't want to worry her."

I continued to argue, in an increasingly whiny voice.

"She should be worried. That's a lot of blood Izuku."

His tone was filled with worry of his own. His use of my name, showing his level of concern.

"I don't wanna call her."

I whined.

"Why not? She's your mom."

"I just don't okay!"

All Might gave a sigh of annoyance.

"Midoriya..."

"No! Don't look at me like that! Unless I'm in trouble, you have no reason to call my mom!"

"You know that's not true..."

"I don't care!"

"Mido-"

"Fuck off!!!"

I can admit... that was definitely uncalled for... he was just concerned for my safety, but I couldn't help but snap at him.

I've been so irritable, and I have no idea why.

Why was I so angry? Was this how Kacchan felt?

It sucks.

He took a deep breath, closing his eyes as he exhaled.

"Midoriya Izuku... I need this to stop. If you're against something, I need you to communicate why... not cuss me out. If this happens again, I will be calling your mom, but for a different reason. I understand that you're upset, but I need you to work with me here. I'm not a mind reader."

"It doesn't take a mind reader to tell that I want you to stay out of my business."

I mumbled angerly.

He sighed again.

"Can we just eat, please?"

He sounded so tired, and the guilt returned tenfold.

God, I was terrible... he was just trying to help... why was I like this?

I ignored him for the rest of the day, choosing to stew in my emotions. I had no clue if he was actually going to call my mom, and I didn't plan to be around to find out.

I laid awake in bed that night. Submerging myself deeper and deeper into the dark fog in my brain. It was like a deep pool of hurt, that I was intentionally floating in. It made me feel heavy, but in an almost comforting way. I was sinking in this pool, but I was completely relaxed in the process.

I should just kill myself...

Author's note:

I wish it was longer, but I didn't sleep last night, and I'm literally writing this in school.

We're almost to where I want to be.

Thoughts and feelings?