𝗡𝗶𝗸𝗸𝗶 𝗦𝗶𝘅𝘅 ~ 𝗢𝗻𝗲-𝗦𝗵𝗼𝘁 𝗖𝗼𝗹𝗹𝗲𝗰𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻 🤍

• 𝗪𝗵𝗲𝗻 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗣𝗮𝘀𝘁 𝗕𝗶𝘁𝗲𝘀 🩷

•❤️•

Y/N's POV, 2008

Back a long time ago, I used to know a guy, a guy who changed my life, a guy who I fell so deeply for nothing he ever did could ever make me walk away from him, his name was Nikki Sixx.

Nikki and I met in 1984 at a party and never really left each other's side since, we had a good relationship even when he was knee deep in drugs and was almost unrecognisable as himself half the time, I still loved him and never once thought of leaving.

Then, Nikki got his life together, got sober and things were good for us... or so I thought... what I hadn't known was a few months after getting out of rehab Nikki had met another woman, Brandi Brandt. A beautiful playboy model who was everything I was insecure of because looking at her then looking at me, I couldn't even compare to her.

I didn't find out about Brandi, or that Nikki had been seeing her behind my back until I went over to his place one day, as we didn't live together after he ignored my calls for nearly two weeks and she opened the door as Nikki was doing something or other I can't remember what Brandi said now, all I remember is her opening the door, me asking who she was and where Nikki was, her answering me, telling me she was his girlfriend and me just wanting the ground to consume me.

I told her who I was and she said she knew and that Nikki had been with her for a few months and ignored me because he didn't know how to tell me it was over. She sounded smug almost as she spoke to me and looked at me as if to say 'why'd Nikki ever wanna be with someone like that?'. And I still ask myself that question everyday.

I wish he'd have just broken up with me but he didn't, he was a coward about it and since that day, I hadn't spoken to him since and he never tried to reach out to me.

And just like that, my life was flipped upside down. The only person I stayed in contact with was Vince as he was the only person who actually reached out and wanted to know where the hell I'd gone.

And we still remained in contact to this day, he was a good friend even if we only really spoke over the phone nowadays given he was always busy with Mötley Crüe.

Back in 1988 though I was grateful to Vince for caring enough about me to ask where I'd gone, and it made the situation slightly easier to deal with but not much.

Nikki had always told me all the things girls want to hear, and he told me whenever I let my insecurities get the better of me that he would never even look at anyone else because to him I was the most beautiful thing on the planet. And to have our relationship end like it did made it feel like the total opposite, it crushed my self esteem for a while and actually since being with Nikki I'd never been able to hold a relationship because I compared them all to Nikki.

Nobody was him and I fell so far for him that no other man could ever replace him for me. That was probably sad as fuck but it was the truth.

I'd never thought I'd have to see him again, but I was a stage manager, I oversaw everything to do with live performances, I'd done both music, live and music videos and theatre work and I worked with Mötley Crüe too after I met Nikki, but my job was how I was invited to the party that I met him, I'd been working for a band, got invited to this party and the Crüe guys were there.

The time I met Nikki I'd just come off the back of my first major job, so working for Mötley Crüe was a huge honour given I was still pretty inexperienced then.