𝗡𝗶𝗸𝗸𝗶 𝗦𝗶𝘅𝘅 ~ 𝗢𝗻𝗲-𝗦𝗵𝗼𝘁 𝗖𝗼𝗹𝗹𝗲𝗰𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻 🤍

• 𝗗𝗲𝗮𝗿 𝗗𝗮𝗿𝗹𝗶𝗻' ^ 🩷

This one-shot is based off the song 'Dear Darlin'' by Olly Murs. Feel free to listen to the song while you read this 😇

Also, flashbacks in this chapter are in italics :)

•❤️•

Nikki's POV, 1997

It's sobering to face reality sometimes, to acknowledge you're not perfect and that you screwed up. It's hard for me sometimes to do that but I was given no choice.

I made a series of mistakes, repeated mistakes actually as I'd made them a few years ago yet managed to realise what I was doing and stop. Somehow, this time I just couldn't see the damage I was inflicting onto my relationship until it was to late.

Y/N was the best thing I'd ever had in my life and ever since I met her she was just special, our relationship went on for a while unlabelled, well, when we first slept together in early 1989, we were both with other people and it was only after that incident where we actually decided to pursue a relationship with one another, but like I said left it unlabelled for a while, about six months or so.

We wanted to give it time and figure how to make it work without potentially fucking up our friendship, when we were confident that wouldn't happen we went public.

We were perfect for each other for so long, years, then I can't say what happened, it was literally almost overnight we just didn't seem to click anymore. It was probably my fault, everything's my fault, I let life get in the way of us I think, mainly the uncertainty of the band and arguments with Tommy regarding the album we were working on and the reappointment of Vince in the band which Tommy was also hesitant about as it publicly showed that we were trying to do damage control and admitting our last album was us trying to jump on a trend to cling to relevance, or that's how he said it.

That break up of relationships in the band over our next album led to arguments at home and I cut myself off from Y/N, and that was the worst decision I ever made.

One day, she got fed up of me and the arguing saying our relationship wasn't what she wanted, we'd changed from how we were when we first got together and she couldn't be with me like this, when I didn't truly know what I wanted from anything in life.

I might not have known what I wanted in a lot of places in my life but she was always a given, I always wanted Y/N in my life and since she left all I could do was think about all the good times we had and I just fall in love with her all over again each time I remember anything we did together.

Some of my favourite memories are when we've been out somewhere with the other guys, and my mind always goes to this one night in 1991, just before everything in the band went to shit before the argument which would cause the decision for Vince to leave, back when things were more certain.

We all went out to celebrate the release of the 'Decade Of Decadence' album, as at that point we'd all given up on being entirely sober so alcohol and cocaine were back on the menu.

It was one of the last nights out we had, all four of us guys out together at least, I went out with Tommy and Vince a few of times after this, separately but this was I think the second to last time we ever hung out as a band outside of band things before everything broke down.

It was a good night in general, everyone was in good spirits and Y/N and I were getting under Vince's skin because of how we were being with each other, it always annoyed Vince, it was always not actual annoyance though, Vince just liked messing around, it was his thing, and I always loved our banter, he was great.