Robin And The Girl With The Crimson Hair

chapter 54

Robin

My eyes watched her carefully. Her cut on her neck opened up again and it was bleeding pretty bad. Her shoulder was bleeding pretty bad. And I saw when she got tackled to the ground by a guy twice her size. I know she is bruised all over....again. I know every wound that just healed, probably opened or reverted back.

This mission was such a bad idea. Well technically it was a success in a way. Our priority was to get Marian out, but now M is in the hand of her worst nightmare. M calls him her nightmare, demon, or the devil, but he's also known as The Sheriff.

I watched as the evil bastard touched her. Kissed her! She didn't accept him, but she didn't push him away either. It was like she wasn't there, a emptiness passed over her eyes and it felt like I was dead inside. This wasn't the woman I knew.

Even when we first met she still had a fire in her but now, there was nothing. She looked at me and I saw nothing, and it broke me. I couldn't for the life of me understand why I agreed to surrender. I know that there are archer all around us, and I know that we are outnumbered. But if she waited a little longer, he would've been dead. We could've figured out a way to get out of there.

And I could tell everyone was talking but I didn't hear any of it. I was just focusing on yelling trying to get her or the sheriffs attention. There were too many men, no matter how I struggled, screamed begged, she or he wouldn't budge.

And before I knew it, a sharpness slammed against my head and I was enveloped in darkness. I was knocked out.

I needed to wake up. What if he's hurting her? What if he.....

I need to wake up!

I will save her and explain everything. I will beg for forgiveness. All she ever wanted was for me to lover her and I couldn't give her that but at this point I'd give her the world if she asked.

But what if she doesn't forgive me? I never meant to hurt her.

The feeling of some wet and cold on my head pulled me out of my thoughts. The back of my head was being cradled by something warm. Am I sitting on someone's lap?

"I know this isn't the right time but why did y'all name her after me? Or at least why did you allow Robin to name her that?" A voice said. It was feminine and soft but also stern and sure. Marian. Lady Marian. I wanted to concentrate, but I couldn't hear apply and what all they said. All I got was the last bit.

"If you wanna know why Robin name her after you your gonna have to wake til he wakes up." Said a man. Harsh, annoyed and broken. Will.

And with that I woke. "You.....broke me." I said as my eyes opened, met hers. All I could see in her eyes was the past and I didn't want it.

"You chose the castle over us. Over me. You left me when I needed you most. I was young and stupid and I tried to find comfort in someone just as broken as me." I said bitterly. I shifted my eyes from her and stared at the dark sky above us.

"I couldn't stay. It was a all too much, and just like you were young and stupid so was I. When you came back from the war, you were different." She said.

She wasn't wrong. I was different. But I fought to get back to her.

"I stayed as long as I could. And you said you needed a spy in the castle. I was your best choice." She said. That was always her excuse.

"Bullshit! We had plenty of other options. We hand men and women outside of you that went to the castle, you didn't have to go, you wanted to go." John spit out in irritation.

"Robin came back for you. He planned, lead, and killed in order to come back to you. And all he wanted from you was to help him through his pain. Instead you left, and we picked up the pieces. When we found M, he was better but he was still hurt and he wasn't thinking clearly. He saw someone he could share the darkness with. That's one of the reasons we were so hesitant to keep her." Will said.

"We were scared that she might push him in her own darkness with her but she didn't. He helped her and in doing so, she was helping him. He had something to do. He had someone he could poor his love and care into since the one person he was gonna give it to abandoned him." Will said in a matter of fact voice.

"I poured my everything into helping her and without realizing it she did the same to me. Though I named her after you, I loved her because she was completely different from you......" my voice began to die as spoke the last few words. I finally admitted......I love her.....

"Of course you finally say it when she isnt here to hear it." John murmured.

A shaky breath left my lips and I could feel a sting behind my eyes. "You knocked me out didn't you? She's still there?" I asked.

"Yeah. She asked if anything went left she put the mission first, though I doubt she knew that it would take this turn. She thought that her injuries would slow us down. I promised her and I wouldn't break it." Will said.

"Why would you make such a stupid promise?" John said.

"She's never asked me for anything and she begged me for this, and the only reason I said yes is because I knew she would do anything to come back to us and we would do anything to get to her." Will said.

"Did you see her face? When he told her? She looked so....broken." I said. It was like watching glass shatter and it scared me. I watched the emotions play on her face. First confusion, then shock, then understanding, then betrayal, and lastly, acceptance. Accepting the words he was saying to her. Believing that she was just a replacement, but it wasn't true.

"Let's be honest with each other. Here's the hard truth Robin. He was right. To you, in the beginning, she was a replacement." John said. I ripped my eyes away from the sky and stared dagger into him. My head swam from the action but I ignored it.

Before I could deny it, Will spoke up in agreement. "Don't deny it. In the beginning I was pity. We all pitied her and we needed someone to fill that hole that she left. We lie because it makes us feel better."

I couldn't say anything. I couldn't say anything because it was true. In the beginning it was pity, but now......now I know I was a fool. She didn't deserve my pity, she deserved my respect. Every ounce of pain she went through, she fought through. And though i denied it, that's what made me love her.....her fight

"We need to get her...." I said.

"We're giving her the day. We need to be focused on sending the Lady to safety. And once we secure her safety, if M didn't find a way to escape, we will got get her." Will said.

I began to sit myself upright from Marians lap. Before even made half way up, a sharp pain slammed against my ribs and my head swam like no other. Even though it hurt to move or even breathe, I pushed down the pain and began to push through.

I couldn't sit on the Lady's lap while talking about how much I love another woman. It didn't feel right. Once I was up, my eyes met John. His eyes were filled with guilt and anger. But I wasn't sure who he was angry at. Me or the situation we're in. To be honest I wouldn't be mad if it was both because I feel the same way.

I leaned back against the big boulder behind me and just thought about how much of failure I was.