Team Catradora

52 -Memory

"Hey-"

Adora jerked her arm away. 

Glimmer and Bow had gone outside to see Adora, who was still huddled beside a tree trunk. Slowly, they sat beside her. Outside Razz's house sat the large willow tree, whose leaves curled over Adora and her friends. Glimmer and Bow sat on opposite sides of the trunk, Adora smushed between them like a marshmallow. 

Glimmer set her hands in her lap. "Hey...how's it going?"

Adora groaned.

"At least she's talking now," Bow said. 

Their body heat felt nice, like a warm hug. Adora leaned her head against her knees. 

"Do you want to...talk...more?"

Adora squeezed her legs, and they both took that as a sign to back off. For the moment, Adora tried to forget they were there. There was a rustling of branches, and snow drizzling down on them. Engines were audible from the street, cars leaving a faint breeze as they drove by. 

Adora shifted her seating position so her leg hit the snow. Even though it was cold, she at least felt more comfortable with her legs down. Unfortunately, she hadn't packed much for snowcoats-she hadn't even thought in her excitement to bring gloves-so she plucked some snowflakes from her hair, and they melted into her fingertips. 

She was reminded of Glimmer's presence when Glimmer tried to brush them off Adora's coat, and Adora jerked. "S-sorry."

Glimmer smiled weakly. "It's okay."

"What can we do for you?" Bow asked. "Razz was...a lot in there."

"Do you think she believes I'm She-Ra? Like, really She-Ra?"

"Honestly?" Bow shrugged. "Maybe? Or maybe this is her way of talking to you, cause you know, she missed a lot of your growing up."

"Maybe." She sighed. "It sucks. I came all this way, hoping for answers, and instead I'm just confused." She ran a hand through her wet hair. "Don't get me wrong, I want the stories, but I don't know if that's what they are to her. Did you hear her? I'm talking about universities, and she can't give me a straight answer. And also, one minute I'm Mara, the next Adora, and finally, I'm She-Ra. She-Ra!"

"I know."

"And Swiftwind? She asked me where he was, she thinks I came by recently-" Adora swallowed. "Do you think..." Adora sighed, not sure how to phrase it. "I don't know, if she has dementia or something? If so, I don't even know how I feel." She cleared her throat. "It's like she doesn't even know time has passed."

"Maybe not," Bow said, slowly. "And we're here for you. But...maybe, since you're here...you could try to get to know her? Hear me out. You both don't know each other well anymore, so maybe you need to meet in the middle."

"But she thinks I'm my mother."

"Oh." Glimmer swallowed. "Mara. That's her name."

It still felt so weird to hear. The word that had emancipated her mind, now suddenly back and in the open. 

"Yeah." Adora shoved her hands-which were now cold-in her jacket pocket. She leaned her neck back against the cold tree. "Mara. Mom. At least I learned that." And she could learn more, maybe, if she let Razz believe she was Mara. Even if it hurt to hear her name. But still, it was better than disappointing her.

She...didn't expect it would be so hard, to be important to Razz, but somehow still unknown. Not like a stranger, but like an actor given a part. She was She-Ra, or she was Mara. How could she be anything else?

"Tell me one thing," Adora said, "do you think I'm gonna look back and regret it if I don't go back in there?"

"Yeah," Glimmer said, seemingly without thinking. "But you can come back later, if you need to. She'll still be here."

Adora closed her eyes. If she could focus, she could almost smell their baking from the open window, faintly trailed by the breeze. She took a big exhale before heading inside.  

Slowly, she stood. Her legs felt wobblily, and a part of her was proud she hadn't cried. Maybe she needed to work on that-Dr. Strong would definitely think so. But she didn't need to think about that yet. She linked arms with Glimmer and Bow, and stepped into the house. 

They were still eating pies. When they entered, Angella walked over. "Oh, you're back." She wiped at her and Glimmer's frosty hair. "It's horrible out. Why didn't you talk in the car?"

They chuckled. Honestly, none of them probably knew why, but it just felt right, and once one started, they all were talking. 

Anglella smiled, confusion in her eyes. "You okay?"

"Yeah," Adora said. She turned to Aria. "Uh, hi. Can we talk for a minute?"

...

"You were right," She said. They the storage room. Adora leaned her arm against one of the boxes. "She's so...different than I thought."

Aria slowly nodded, eyes towards the carpeted floor. "It's hard to tell, isn't it?"

"And that's how she talks about me when I'm not here, right?"

"Right," she said. " But she has a good heart, if you get to know her. And a big imagination."

"Right," Adora said. "I know that. And I am going to-it just caught me off guard. And I...how do I act? Do I pretend I'm She-Ra or mom, or do I be me?"

"You be whatever you want." Aria shrugged. "I doubt that'll stop her from calling you She-Ra, though."

"Okay..." Adora frowned. "I don't want to let her down, though." She sighed. She needed Razz to like her, no matter what. Even if it didn't yield the answers Adora had hoped for, that didn't mean she wanted to forget everything she had in the past.  "I'll have to...figure it out, I guess."

...

"And have you heard the story of when Adora fought an army of hoard soldiers with a toothbrush?"

"Bow," Adora called as she entered the room, "what are you doing?"

Bow was standing on his chair, two forks in his hands, held like a fake sword. If he was going to do that, he should have at least used Adora's faux sword.

At the sight of Adora, he slowly stepped down, smiling sheepishly. "Oh, uh...heh..."

"We were just hearing a story about...you." Angella smirked as she sipped a cup of coffee. "Or, She-Ra, actually."

"Well." Adora gave him a sideways look. "I don't remember that story."

Bow blushed. "Well, uh...maybe I got a tad carried away."

" Trust me, he was calm compared to a second ago." Glimmer shook her head. "Before you got here, it was an army of dragons with two toothbrushes."

Razz shook her head. "Making up stories. Come on, let me tell you about the time She-Ra saved Thaymore."