Bad day (part 8)

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Beam's P.O.V.

Avoiding Forth wasn't much of an issue. It's a miracle how much we've seen of each other in the last few weeks. In reality for as long as we've known each other if we crossed paths once a month it was a lot. But today is Friday and Phana is inviting me to the bar. I would decline since I may see Forth. It's only been a couple of days since I last saw him. But I left the bar last Friday which was already suspicious. If I don't go today they are going to start questioning things. I sighed getting ready. Once I was done I waited for KIt and Phana to be done. It was my turn to drive us. When Kit was ready we made the drive to Phana's dorm.

"If you get shitfaced today I'm not carrying you home." I warned Phana when he got in. He rolled his eyes.

"I won't. Now let's go." he said and I sighed driving to our usual bar. When we arrived we quickly spotted the engineering guys and headed towards them.

"Hey guys." said Phana. They all acknowledged us in some way and we sat down. I made eye contact with Forth for a second before looking away. Luckily I was sitting alone on a couch.

Soon we were all drinking and talking. I was a little quiet but that wasn't that unusual. I spent most of my time looking around trying to find something interesting. Otherwise, I might just spend my time looking at Forth. Every once in a while I couldn't help myself and did it anyway. Especially when he stood up. I was spaced out so I didn't know the reason. I just watched him walk away until I could tell he was heading to the bathroom and I was relieved he wasn't flirting with anyone. I shouldn't have come. Even if he leaves with anyone he's not doing anything wrong. I gulped what was left of my drink.

"Are you ok?" asked Phana and I turned to look at him.

"Yeah, why?" I asked.

"You're drinking more than usual and you are also quieter." he said glancing at me suspiciously. I just glared at him.

"I'm fine, You're imagining things." I said rolling my eyes. He looked at me for a few more seconds before shrugging and continuing to talk with the other guys. I tried to keep up with the conversation but I just wasn't interested. So I just kept drinking. I was surprised when Forth came back and sat beside me. I tried to act normal and just ignored it even if I was painfully aware. That's until he poked my shoulder. So I turned to look at him.

"Why are you drinking so much today?" He whispered. I just shrugged.

"I just feel like drinking today." I said and he looked at me suspiciously.

"Who's taking you home?" he continued and I looked away not answering. "Beam." He said this time forgetting to whisper. Everyone turned to look at us. But I could feel Forth's eyes burning a hole through my head. He didn't care.

"I am." I answered. He sighed not answering. When we didn't say anything else everyone went back to talking by themselves.

"If you continue drinking like that I won't let you drive." he said.

"I'm not drunk." I said turning to look at him so he would believe me.

"Not right now. But if you keep drinking like that it won't be long." he said and I noticed he was getting mad.

"Whatever." I said continuing to drink. During the night Ming arrived and Kit left with him. Wayo also arrived and Phana told me he was leaving with him. By that point, I was tipsy and decided to slow down on my drinking. I looked at the whisky in my hand. This will be my last and I will drink it slowly. That was until a girl approached Forth and was clearly trying to flirt with him. I caught myself glaring at her and felt embarrassed. I looked at the drink in my hand and gulped it down. That's my cue to leave.

"All right, I'm leaving." I said trying not to sound drunk. But just standing up I felt wobbly. Before I could even think of taking a step Forth grabbed my wrist. I looked at him and he shaked his head no. I would've listened but the girl was still standing in front of him and I didn't want to see that. Thinking his grip wouldn't stop me I tried walking but he wasn't budging. Instead, he pulled me slowly towards him. With a huff, I sat down again trying not to attract more attention. Phana already left though and Park and Lam didn't seem to care a lot. I grumpily sat down beside him. Since he was pulling me I ended really close to him. I crossed my arms and he let go for a second. I was relieved until his hand ended on my knee. It seems like he is serious about not letting me go. I grabbed another drink and he just looked at me with a serious face. I just shrugged drinking anyway. Before I was done with my drink the girl had left.

"Where do you think you are going?" He asked and I could tell he was angry.

"Home." I sheepishly replied.

"Not by yourself. You are drunk." He glared at me.

"I'm not leaving my car here." I stubbornly said.

"Fine, give me the keys I will take you." He said. Before I could even reply he continued talking. "It's not a question. You don't have a choice." he said and I sighed.

"Fine, let's go then." I said standing up and he helped me walk to the car. I got in the passenger seat. I spent all the drive looking out the window not wanting to talk with him. It was a bad idea to get drunk. My feelings are all over the place right now. As we got to my apartment I rushed to get there.

"Don't tell me you want to vomit." Said Forth following me.

"I'm not you can leave I'm already home." I said continuing to walk. Finally, I reached my door.

"What? No sleep over today." he joked and this time I turned to look at him to see if he was serious. It would be bad for my heart letting him sleep here tonight. But I wouldn't have the heart to deny him. "There's that look again." He said coming closer and my heart started beating faster. "I've been worried about you since Monday." He said inspecting my face. His hand on my cheek his thumb caressing just under my eyes. He was so close and seemed so concerned it melted my heart. I tried to push him away to no avail. I wanted to but my hands betrayed me wanting to pull him closer instead so that's what I did. He stumbled into me after I put more force than I thought. That's when our lips crashed and my resolve broke. I started kissing him and for a second he responded. I melted into the kiss. I don't know if it's because I was drunk but I felt on cloud nine. It didn't last long since Forth pulled back a little our foreheads still resting together. Our breathing uneven.

"You're drunk." He whispered. I tried pulling him in again but he backed off. I was hurt.

"I'm sorry." I said quickly opening the door. I got in as fast as I could.

"Beam." He tried to say not letting me close the door. I just looked at him and I could feel the tears threatening to fall.

"Leave please." I managed to say. He looked at me and I know I must look desperate right now. "Forget about this. I'm just drunk. Leave please." I said my voice breaking at the end and the tears started to fall. I looked away trying to close the door still. He tried once again.

"Beam please just listen." He said.

But I didn't say anything. I didn't even look at him since I was crying now. I kept desperately pushing the door. He sighed stepping away and allowing me to close it. I let out a relieved sigh sliding against the door. What the fuck did I just do. The tears just kept coming it hurt so bad even if I knew he didn't feel the same. Suddenly I didn't even feel that drunk. With no energy left, I just climbed into bed crying my eyes out.





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