His Obsession ➸ Taekook ✓

- Eleventh -

"You look tired."

Jungkook turned to Suzy, who was putting on her long frilly dress just a few minutes before the start of the show. The young woman was watching him with a worried expression.

"Suzy, I always look tired." replied Jungkook, in what he hoped was a light tone.

But the dancer didn't give him the smile he was hoping for. The young man sighed.

"I work in a big company, you know. Employees like me rarely have time to rest. I'm lucky to be able to come here. So please, don't worry."

Suzy wasn't convinced. Jungkook liked the fact that she was worried about him, Suzy had that kind of maternal instinct that the young man sorely lacked. She wasn't much older than him, probably the same age as Yoongi. But she always took care of the people around her. If Jungkook had met her earlier, maybe things would have been different. Maybe he would have taken her advice, maybe he would have let her look after him like a mother figure.

But he didn't. It was too late to save him. So there was no point in worrying. Jungkook was already dead. And he would soon be for good. It was only a matter of time.

"Suzy, the show's about to start." Jungkook said to the dancer. "You'd better hurry up."

The tall blonde wanted to reply, but other dancers called her, and she realised she was too late. So she gave up, and hurried to get ready before leaving the dressing room.

The room fell back into silence, leaving Jungkook alone. Alone with his dark thoughts, the ones that have gnawed at him day and night for years. The ones that had killed him, and were now slowly nibbling away at his remains, one day to engulf him completely.

He often wondered why it had come to this. Why had it all happened? Why had his life been one misfortune after another? He had never been happy. He felt like he'd been struggling all his life. And even now, he couldn't even die. He wanted to, he had resigned himself to it, but he couldn't.

He had to finish his mission first.

***

Jungkook walked towards the stage, the great hall plunged into complete darkness. He found a certain comfort in this darkness. He knew that around fifty people were present, yet no one could see him. He was hidden from view in this darkness. No one could see his sins, not even him. He was safe.

But he knew that this safety was ephemeral. No sooner had he positioned himself in front of the microphone than the light above him came back on, forming a single halo over him. And all eyes turned to Jungkook. Not a single one was missing. And there was something terrifying about that.

He'd never told anyone about it, this strange feeling that the scene gave him. It was both a release and a torment. He loved singing because he felt he was doing something that was his own. Something he had chosen. And to see that others enjoyed it so much was rewarding. But on the other hand, he had the impression that the slightest mistake would be fatal. That if he wasn't careful, the mask he'd spent years building would fall off and reveal to the world what a mistake he was.

And that was so exhausting.

The music started, and despite his anxiety, he sang. He gripped the microphone tightly, closing his eyes for a few seconds to focus solely on his singing, and let his voice flood the room. Honestly, he was afraid to open his eyes again. He always had that little moment at the beginning of his performance when he didn't have to look at anyone. Where he just needed to be with himself.

Eventually, though, he opened them again, timidly scanning the room with his gaze. And that's when he saw him.

Kim Taehyung.