Petals on The Moon || Reyna Ramirez-Arellano x Fem!OC

LXXIV

-ˋˏ ༻❁༺ ˎˊ-

Dear Diary,

Sebastian decided we needed a new tradition; pre-quest sleepovers.

Lisa and Felix were both terrified that we were going out on another quest, but proud of our valor, so Felix baked us a quick cake that we killed in about three seconds. Alessia and Diana played with the remaining bits of icing that weren't going to go on the cake.

"They're... big," I said, staring at the girls.

Felix struggled to hold Alessia up. "Yeah, well... blame Mars." He hefted her into her high chair and she giggled. "What time will you leave?"

"Dawn," Sebastian said, "after we leave an offering to Mars and Bellona." He licked frosting from his fingertips. "So, guys, let's head to the basement!" He rose. "Got something to show ya."

Jason and I followed Suki and Sebastian down the basement, which did look kind of spectacular. But I wasn't gonna tell Sebastian that he actually did a good job, since I already can't stand his ego.

"Guys!" Seb reached for a camcorder that was already on, and grinned as he focused it on me and Jason. "Smile!"

Jason offered a brilliant smile. I did not. Sebastian put the camcorder down. "Reyna, you're such a buzzkill." Suki powered up the computer and logged into some sort of weird software that made me dizzy with just a glance. "You should really loosen up."

How could I possibly loosen up around someone like Sebastian? If I let my guard down even once around him, he takes it as an opportunity to grab me or attack me or worse- show affection. But, the best tactic with him is to ignore him. Any kind of attention, good or bad, just eggs him on, so I turned to Jason. "You can still back out. Rome needs two praetors."

"Rome needs faith in their leaders, too," Jason pointed out. "Soledad has always been the better one at holding down the fort. I'm better in the field."

"No," I said. "You can hold down the fort, too. You're just better at touching people."

He smiled at me, and I quickly turned away as Suki got the computer set up the way she needed it. "Sebastian, I don't know why you-"

"SHHH!" Suki grabbed her bass and huffed as her brother rudely shushed her. Sebastian turned to me and Jason. "We don't have any lyrics for this. So, I just want you guys to listen, and tell me how it makes you feel."

That surprised me. I drew up a chair and sat down as Suki hit the play button. I heard a drum beat, but it was very faint and light. Nothing particularly fast or heavy. Sebastian began strumming on the guitar, and Suki plucked her bass strings. The song was fairly calm, but there was a weird sort of sadness that came from it.

I listened carefully. At one part, Sebastian played a more melodic tune with his guitar. The music made me think of the present. That felt weird. Usually, music makes me think of my past. It makes me think of my sister and my father, of dancing in Puerto Rico. This music, however, made me feel painfully aware of my surroundings. I saw Suki's somewhat melancholic face and Jason's broadening shoulders. Sebastian played his guitar with conviction, his face strangely determined.

I suddenly remembered that this wasn't something Sebastian and Suki are doing as a fun pastime. They're really pursuing this. They want to be something. And I thought about Sebastian's words earlier; My mom's disappointed. He didn't elaborate on that. And I know she still loves him, but it's a feeling I relate to well; the feeling that you're not growing up to be what they want you to be.