Author Games: Memoranda Of Terror

Special Awards: Quick Broadcast

Vinella Cola has been long tipped to present the mock-awards ceremony, but instead it is a harrassed looking Alithia Warwell who takes to the stage, dressed in her usual slate grey suit but with the inclusion of a short cape made of panels that lock together like armour. Khave bounces on after her, turning on his grin instantly. They assemble behind a podium and wait for the eager crowd to fall silent.

"Many apologies for the changes to tonight's show," Alithia begins, "Vinella requires emergency nail surgery after an incident during the finals, and Pandora was called away to a relative. I have been called in on short notice; you will have to make do."

"Luckily, you get me too!" Khave quips. His fellow Gamemaker gives him a steely glare, which he shrugs off with an appeal to the audience

"We've got to have our eye candy, haven't we?"

Alithia's grin is tense. This is clearly not her natural situation. "Yes. I suppose so. And speaking of eye candy, it's onto our first award of the night. This award goes to the tribute with the most - do I have to read Vinella's prompts? Fine - ravishing tributes of the Games, male and female!"

Khave and a few of the audience snicker at her discomfort as he produces a golden envelope from the podium and opens it with a flourish.

"Ladies and gentlemen, your winners of the Most Desirable award are...Elias Uriah Pique and Blissia Valiant!"

There are good-natured groans in the crowd where people have lost money, but most seem pleased with the result. The giant screen at the back of the stage projects a glowering Elias and Blissia's sleek smile behind the podium, to many whistles.

"And our next award is for the tribute that we of the Capitol would most like to claim as our own. There were several nominations, but a consensus was eventually agreed. Khave, if you will..."

"Gladly, Miss Warwell," Khave beams, and turns his attention - and his smile - to a second envelope. He opens it slowly, relishing the attention.

"And the recipient of the Capitol's Sweetheart award is...ladies and gentlement what a surprise, it's the Capitol's own Solum Magnus and his fantabulous hair!"

The cheers for Solum shake the stage as his image is shown on the screen. It's a flattering picture that even Solum himself would have been proud of, if he were still alive. Alithia hushes them quickly and adjusts her cape.

"Now, we all know that names can mean a lot, from Khave's tea and scones to Alithia's brutal - I'm going to have a word with her about this - honesty and Pandora's beautiful historical muse. However, out there in the districts, it's common to get boring names with no imagination. That's why we have decided to award a special prize to the tribute with the best name, to give their families something to be proud of. Khave..."

Khave's laughter has to be suppressed before he can continue.

"The best name award is hereby given to...Elmo Wattson!"

Elmo looks sulky on screen as he regards the names burned into the back of his hand. The cold damp arena behind him clashes wildly with the vibrance of the Capitol crowd.

"We like to pick our favourites...well, Vinella does anyway," Alithia snaps, "And we're always interested to see just how all the districts work together. So we also want to reward the district who performed best in this Games; extra rations will be sent in to them at some point over the next month. And the district winning this lucky prize is..."

"District Three, for the wonderful and quirky performances of Piper Corbet and Gizmo Glitch!" Khave seems to be hardwired to wink at a camera whenever the word 'quirky' is mentioned. The Capitol treat him with an extra cheer as Gizmo and Piper shaking hands at the reaping appear, over the Three seal.

"Congratulations to the technology district," Alithia says, handing another envelope to Khave, "Our next award is the Dark Horse award, to commend those tributes who beat their odds to achieve wonderful things. This year, the award is sponsored by the simply fantastic Cinna's Creations, the number one boutique for those in the public eye."

Khave butts in, laughing and waving in a desperate attempt to stop the atmosphere from sinking, "And there was only one real candidate for this award, ladies and gentlemen, and that was District Nine's Vixen Axwell!"

A huge round of applause bursts over the square and several people cheer and catcall. Vixen's image could not have been chosen better; he looks up at the camera, rain trickling down his face.

"Our penultimate award is given to the tribute who responded best to a single challenge, who made us sit up and take note. There were many candidates and many arguments, mostly with Alithia - as soon as Vinella is out of hospital, we're going to have a talk about this - but in the end only one could be chosen. In the interests of fairness, the finals are not included in this award. If you would do the honours, Khave?"

"Quite happily, Miss Warwell, because let me tell you, your style leaves a lot to be desired! Aren't you glad you've got me, citizens?" he calls. The crowd call back their agreement, if somewhat tentatively, and each individual who Alithia rests her glare on stops instantly and looks at their feet.

"The award, Khave?"

"Indeed, Alithia, I'm getting there! The Best Entry award goes to...Vixen Axwell for his response to the task 'The Danger Inside'!"

The applause it cut short by Alithia abruptly reaching for the final envelope and thrusting it at Khave. His smile doesn't even falter. "Seems like we're in a bit of a hurry, doesn't it?" he laughs, "Never mind! Our final award is for the quote, and that's the best things we've heard all Games. There was a lot to choose from, from Merry's poetry to Teal's camp rules, some of which have already been adapted into wedding vows, if my sources are correct! We have some dedicated people over here! However, the award goes to neither of those. It was chosen by our very own Head Gamemaker for reasons that she'd doubtless be able to explain if we were bothered, and it comes from Coral Baudelaire's Grande Finale entry!"

Instead of reading it aloud, the words fade onto the screen, glittering gold on a lilac heather background.

'Do princesses kill other people?'

Recap:

Most Desirable: Elias Uriah Pique (District Twelve) and Blissia Valiant (District Two)

Capitol Sweetheart: Solum Magnus (Capitol)

Best Name: Elmo Wattson (District Five)

Best District: District Three (Piper Corbet and Gizmo Glitch)

Dark Horse: Vixen Axwell (District Nine)

Best Entry: Vixen Axwell, The Danger Inside

Best Quote: Coral Baudelaire, The Grande Finale, 'Do princesses kill other peeople?'

As a reminder, voting on The Grande Finale closes at 22:00 Capitol time (that's 10PM BST) on Sunday 19th May. Get voting to see your favourite win, and we'll see you then!