Chasing Rainbows

Part Two: Chapter Ninety One

"Looks like someone had too much fun last night," Hannah teases. I don't reply. I can't reply. All I can think about are my choices last night. The choices that are making my body scream and crave every once of medication that I've missed; the medication that used to run my life.

"Not now Hannah," I grumble, trying to find something, anything. I check the med cabinet. There's nothing with an O in it.

"Kat, what's going on?"

"Nothing," I growl, taking five Advil down dry.

"I don't think that was safe." My eyes roll. "Okay, what the hell is going on with you?"

"What's it to you?" I retort bitterly.

"Kat," Hannah says, slowly. "What happened last night?" Her voice is tender, filled with care.

"God! I already told you! Nothing!" I shout, unaware of why I'm so angry. Well, not unaware. I just refuse to admit that after so long, I've fallen so helplessly back into the need for substances. My teeth are set on edge, and I could fall apart at any second. I need it. I feel as if I can't live without it. Dear God, I thought I was done with this part of my life.

"Please, Larkin, I just want to make sure you're okay," Hannah states, using my full name for the first time in years. The sound of it bring me back to my phone call with Reese last night, and makes me feel like the scared little girl from Australia.

"Larkin," He started, becoming serious. "What's going on? Why are you crying?"

"R-Reese," I stuttered out. "I made a mistake. A huge mistake. I shouldn't have done this on my own."

"Larkin, talk to me. What did you do?" His voice was laced with worry.

"I.... I.... I'm at a party," I started slowly. Reese took a sharp breath. "I started drinking, and I wasn't keeping track of myself. Before I knew it, I was on the dance floor, and you know, it was fun. It wasn't reality, but it was fun. Then, well, a couple of guys were snorting coke on the side-"

"Larkin," Reese tried to soothe, but I just kept going.

"And I don't know why I thought it was a good idea, but I did it anyways. And once I started, it's like I couldn't stop! Reese! I'm so sorry! I messed up! And no it's all that I can think about. I need it."

"Larkin, listen to me," Reese's voice commands. "You're going to be alright. It will all be okay."

"Kat?" Hannah speaks, breaking me out of the flash back. "You're scaring me."

"Sorry... I... I, um, I'll be back later." With that, I make a beeline for the front door.