*HUGE DISCLAIMER* I WROTE THIS WHEN I WAS 12YRS OLD, SO EXCUSE GRAMMAR AND CRINGINESS
What if.....?
Katniss has finally returned to District 12 both haunted and shattered by the past knowing the peace gained does not supply her with security and ha...
What if? What if life is finally becoming good again? What if Sophie's third Christmas will be her best? What if things are slowly improving? What if the past will gradually fade from constantly on my mind to a faint memory? What if with Peeta now living with me, the years will be different? What if there is finally light coming our way? What if despite the ups and downs that have left and continue to come our way we will always remain unbroken?
What if? What if? What if...
---
The winter is fully here now, the cold December has taken over twelve. Each morning we are awoken to a glistening wonderland. Icicles hang from the trees, frost laid on the grass like a layer of cling film and every droplet of water frozen over on the side walk. When walking outside even the frost immediately bites at your fingers, eventually numbing your touch completely. Your breath looks like a mist of smoke, emerging from your mouth as your teeth chatter. The temperature dropped dramatically in the first week of the month, enough to make your lips go deep purple. We were all used to a cold winter in twelve, but nothing like this had we experienced. Eventually though this dangerous ice began to ease away slightly, enough to make it safe to travel but with caution. I always felt slightly worried with Peeta going to work, afraid of him getting hurt. But it was always the kiss he greeted me with when he came home that reassured me that he was okay. Today has been the best day of the month so far when it comes to weather, the sun out early this morning to melt away the ice just before noon. Peeta and Sophie went to get the Christmas tree today, Sophie really just wanted a way to leave the house I think because we all know she couldn't do anything to help. She as a two year old feels quite cramped and irritated when she can't go outside and run around. She has so much energy within her, sometimes I wonder where she gets it from. I'm eating a sandwich when I hear the front door open, the cold breeze racing through the house until the door is shut once more. Sophie rushes into the room and says excitedly
"We got the tree!"
She says tree like twree which makes me laugh a little as I rub her head. Peeta soon enters the living room and puts the tree leaning against the wall. He looks at me with a smile of exhaustion, his face sweaty but flustered at the same time. He pulls off his gloves her wore to protect his hands from both splinters and the cold and throws them up on the counter. He walks over and plants a quick his on my lips before sitting down on the couch with a large sigh, looking at the tree quite satisfied. I put on the kettle and with Sophie on my hip go into the living room and tell Peeta
"Looks nice"
He nods, still trying to catch his breath. I know it must have been hard enough to get here, with a prosthetic slowing him down also. I offered to come help but of course I was told there was no need. I pour him a cup of tea and for me and walk into the room. Sophie is curled up beside him and talking to her teddy in a mumbled tone. I hand him his mug of tea which he takes gratefully, nodding thank you. We then all sit for a while and look at the tree. 2 hours later it is standing proudly in the corner, glistening with lights and baubles. To finish it off Peeta lifts Sophie high to place the star on top. For a second I push all the bad thoughts that are in my mind to the surface of my mind, pushing them far away and for a moment I am thankful. Thankful for this, for Peeta, for Sophie, for people who truly love me. I am thankful for this life, for this happiness I have forever awaited, for this moment. I am thankful for everything in my life that has made me happy. I am thankful for love, the love Peeta provides me, his love after all is what keeps me smiling, keeps me happy and uplifted everyday. But I am also thankful for the fire inside of me, the fire that will burn for a lifetime, the fire that got me where I am today.
--
"MUMMY! DADDY! LOOK!"
Sophie runs into our room, pulling the curtains open and allowing the blinding light to flood in. Peeta moans, after working 4 days a week he does get tired and like his sleep. It's not too early so I'm not too tired. I pull myself out of bed and follow Sophie to the window to see what she wants us to see. Then before my eyes I see the land outside covered by a white sheet of snow, coating the grass like a blanket, not a green blade in sight. I look down at Sophie, her green eyes sparkling with excitement. Last year she was too young to understand the snow, therefore didn't get anything out of it. Soon enough Peeta is by our side and overlooking the winter wonderland outside. Peeta grins at Sophie and says
"Well if you want to go outside you better get dressed and eat your breakfast"
And before he can even say any more she has ran out of the room, leaving me and Peeta laughing.
---
After breakfast we all get dressed in warm clothes. I help Sophie put on a heavy coat, scarf and hat. Usually she would protest to this but not today, she badly wants to go outside. Once we are all ready we go outside the back garden. I stand on the snow coated porch as Sophie runs through the snow, looking enchanted at the snowflakes dancing through the wind above her head. All of a sudden I feel a huge lump of cold snow down my neck, causing me to let out a small scream of shock. I whip around to find Peeta laughing. I say to him in a threatening tone
"You'll pay for that"
He raises an eyebrow question but as soon as I begin to reach for a handful so snow he begins to run across the garden. I quickly construct a snowball in my hands before following him. Soon enough I catch up to him and hit him in the back of the head with a snowball. He turns and wraps his arms around me, both of us laughing. Suddenly our feet both step on an icy patch and we fall to the ground. Peeta's body falls first, protecting mine which falls on top of his. Luckily he falls into a large patch of thick snow which saves his fall.
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Our faces are only inches apart, his hand moving slowly from my neck to my cheek allowing his fingers covered in the wool of his glove to make a circle motion on my cheek. I look deep into his blue eyes that are glowing as bright as his smile. Then all of a sudden I feel that familiar urge, the want and the need for his touch, his taste and his lips. I need him, I need that rush of adrenaline only he can give me. So then as I did when we last fell in the snow I kiss him, pressing my lips to his to be immediately greeted by his warm vibe.
Except this time it isn't that similar. Because its not for the camera's, for the audience and for the act for President Snow. This time it's for us, to seal this memory, to show that this is it, this love is real, that there is no more camera's watching, no crowds cheering. The only noise I hear now is my heart beating. Snowflakes catch between our kiss as we still do not dare to pull away. Eventually we are forced to do so and as my eyes open slowly I see his face, his goofy grin plastered across it and his blue eyes glistening like a thousand stars joint as one. He whispers to me, his smile not at all faded
"You love me, Real or not real?"
He knows the answer of course but there are still moments like this in which he asks. Like me asking his to stay with me. Its reassurance mostly, knowing that feeling haven't changed. And after all we've been through nobody could question that. I tell him
"Real, Always real"
Then his smile though it may have seemed impossible, grows a little bit bigger.
---
We soon enough go inside after Sophie showed us her snowman. I could see easily it was time to go back inside, her fingers were obviously numbed, her cheeks bright red and her lips a pale shade of purple. Peeta lifted her inside and sat her before the fire. He filled the fire with logs as I returned from the kitchen with 3 hot chocolates. This was the only thing I could make better than Peeta, he knows that. I can't cook or bake well so this is my only thing I offer guests that I can make. I hand Peeta his and give Sophie her's in her cup that makes sure it won't spill. I then curl up next to Peeta, my head on his shoulder and his resting lightly on my head. Sophie soon crawls onto my lap and cuddles into me. Then we all sit together by the fire, watching the dancing flames as they heat us. I recall watching flames with despair and loneliness, but today I watch them with the company of my family and with hope. Hope that this better life will continue to bring happiness to us all.
