What if?- A Mockingjay Story

Chapter 82

What if?

What if things will become good again? What if us coming back together is a sign that things can become good again? What if this is just the beginning of our true healing? What if eventually we will be fully healed and I will no longer ask what if, no longer expect the worst? For now, asking what if is what keeps me sane.

What if? What if? What if...
---
The sunlight seeping through the thin curtains highlight his blond hair as I run my fingers through it. His face is inches from mine, his quite and slow breath against my face as my fingers brush his hair. His face is peaceful as he sleeps, his arms stay locked around me despite him sleeping and his grip remains not painfully strong but firm. As if he's afraid of me leaving, afraid if he lets go then I will be gone. It's another curse put upon us after the games and the rebellion. Being split up after the quell we have learned enough to hold on tight once retrieving each other, to never let go. To protect each other. And though all is peaceful now that vow to protect each other remains. It's a curse as well as a gift. It means we stand by each other in all situations but we also fear that in stepping back to leave someone independent that we will Pay the price. After a while he moans softly, moving as he slowly wakes up. His eyes then flutter open and his familiar blue iris' look into mine. He says in a whisper

"Good morning"

I smile. I feel his fingers lock in mine under the bedsheets between us as I reply

"Good morning"

For a minute he just looks at me in silence. It's as if he's examining every part of my face. Every wrinkle, every scar, every cut, every freckle, every eyelash, every eyebrow hair, everything my face possess. Every ugly part of me, every part he tells me is beautiful, every scar that tells me I'll never escape the past. Take it in Peeta. Take in every part and finally realise it's not the beautiful face you envision. But he won't ever see that. He will always see me as beautiful, as imperfectly perfect. And that's why I love him. His finger strokes my cheek, moving slowly until reaching my chin and whispering

"Beautiful"

He guides my face toward his, our lips crashing together. Once we pull away my smile has grown considerably. I whisper to him, my lips still tingling from his touch

"I just never thought I'd wake up to you beside me again"

I meet his eyes. They lure me to him once more and our lips reconnect and once again my body is engulfed with the amazing sensation of his lips joining mine.
---

"Door Mummy!!!"

Sophie yells, her mouth full of cereal causing me to laugh. I tell her

"Okay!"

Peeta sits beside her, dabbing her chin with a laugh as she spills more milk over it. I walk to the hall and open the door to find Gracie. She greets me with a hug, talking so quickly I can't process all she's saying only picking up some words of congratulations on us getting back together. I allow her to step in and Sophie runs into her arms almost straight away. Gracie embraces her and picks her up into her arms, whispering something in her ear I can't quite catch. Sophie nods in response, climbing down from her arms and running out of the room before I can even ask her. I turn to Peeta who asks Gracie

"What are you doing here?"

He doesn't sound surprised just curious. She replies

"I thought me and Sophie could have a girls day out. And you two could you know, catch up"

She winks causing me to laugh. Peeta grins and then turns to me and with a questioning look