What if?- A Mockingjay Story

Chapter 84

What if?

What if this is a bad idea? What if I shouldn't go? What if she doesn't deserve to meet me after all these years? But what if I have no way out of this, she knows where I live after all? And besides, what if I can' t run from her forever?

What if? What if? What if...

---

Katniss' POV

I straighten my dress before the mirror and let out a shaky sigh. I know I can't escape this situation, I can't keep running from her. I know from experience that in running from someone you eventually must face them. It's my time to stop running. To turn around and face her. My mother. After a while Peeta enters the room as I brush my hair before the mirror. He sits on the bed and watches me in silence. Eventually he says

"You're really doing this?"

I continue to brush my hair as I say

"Yeah.... I can't keep running. I have to face her at some point"

He nods and says

"I think you're right"

He stands a moment later and kisses my cheek before walking out of the room. I then turn back to the mirror and placing the hairbrush aside stare at my reflection for a moment. I then inhale a deep breath and say to myself

"Here we go"

---

I arrive at the cafe a few minutes after 1 O'Clock, bag clutched in hand as I look around the cafe. Then I hear across the room

"Katniss"

Then I see her, risen from her seat and her eyes taking in me, examining me almost. It makes me shift uncomfortably. She doesn't say anything and neither do I but follow her to the table. I noticed the sceond I saw her that her apperance hadn't changed a bit. I sit down across from her and fiddle with my bag as I feel her eyes continuing to watch me. She asks me sounding too enthusiastic

"How are you?"

I reply back simply

"Fine"

After a few minutes she says, her voice sounding breathless

"You've changed so much"

I say sharply

"People tend to change over 3 years"

She pauses for a moment and lets out what sounds like a disappointed sigh before she says

"You know I couldn't have come back Katniss"

That's when my anger arises and I pounce

"I could have said the exact same thing but this is home. And besides just because she died doesn't mean I was okay. I suffered so much from being on the battlefield to watching my sister die on it. But I still came home. I can't forgive you for what you've done and even on not returning home you weren't even that determined to contact me"

She replies, her voice small

"I called...."

I jump back

"Not more than 4 times... I don't even know why I came in the first place"

I start putting my phone in my bag until she says, her tone of voice completely shifted

"You may not see it but what I did is not wrong. I couldn't come back"

I stop and turn to her and say through gritted teeth as my eyes glance at my white knuckles