Heart Broken (Unedited)

Chapter Six

"So endure patiently with beautiful patience"

Ruqayyah

I cried all the way from Gombe to Katsina. I kept thinking my glands would run out of tears, but boy was I wrong. It can never be well described how one feels when she is leaving her parent's to her husband's. The house you've lived all your life, the people you've known all your life to a new place. A new start with a foreign man all alone and a house to run all by yourself. Having responsibilities set upon your shoulders. And in my case a place i've never been to and a man i've never seen. How do i cope? My Aunties keep telling me its okay and not to cry. How do they except me to do that when i know we will part in less than 24 hours. It isn't fair. I should be allowed to cry to my heart's content. And that is only a topping on the cake when i remember the things i've been told before we left home. These people expect me to be perfect i guess but i have flaws. Heck,  everyone does. They don't want to think of the possibility of a mistake. Oh and they keep forgetting or is it ignoring the fact that i am younger than him so he is the one to cater for me and overlook my flaws and not the other way round. And my! if any word had the power of making a person deaf 'cause of its repetitive utterance, i would have been long over a day deaf. Well with the way everyone keeps telling me to be patient! Stay patient! Ruqayyah patience! Marriage is all about patience! It's become a mantra.

*
In the morning, after i took my bath and wore a new set of  clothes that smelt heavenly without even a spray of perfume, i joined my Aunties (part of the bride's entourage) on the rug who were having breakfast which was brought by the groom's family. After breakfast, they went over "the talk" again. You know about the patience thing and my husband's right on me which i had to fulfill, failure of which will mean disobeying Allah. They also reminded me that my Jannah lies beneath his feet. Advised me to be prayerful and be at my best behavior always. Take care of him, be understanding, guard what is his, keep his secrets, comfort him, support him, love him, respect him, respect his family as you do yours. Put in mind that marriage is an act of worship and doing it right is the ticket to attaining the ultimate goal, jannah. They explained. I remained seated with my legs crossed and my head bowed as tears sprang free from where i thought i have kept them locked. "The talk" always shatters my defences. Few minutes passed and i hear a male voice say the salam. The owner of the voice greeted my aunties in a very respectable manner. He informed them that the cars that will be driving them back to Gombe would be ready in about half an hour. He stood by the door for a minute as my Aunties kept teasing him about being an ango (newly married man). So this is the Ya Ahmad guy. I wanted to take a look at him but i couldn't. I was shy. He asked my Aunty why i was still crying and she told him not to worry 'cause most brides go through that phase. She told him that i'll eventually stop when they leave. He said something which i did not hear and left the room.

*
From the room i was in, i could hear him bid them a safe journey after thanking them countless times. Seconds later, i heard the sound of the gates opening and the cars driving out. It broke my heart that they left me behind and even stopped me from walking them to the car. That made more tears run down my cheeks. Some minutes later, i heard the front door open then close. His footsteps and subsequent opening and closing of another door. Seconds passed, then minutes, an hour and it was still silent. The horrid silence was later replaced by the muadhin's voice. I rose up and headed to the adjoining bathroom to perform wudhu after then i returned to the room to pray the zuhr prayer. I was still sitting on the praying mat making du'a when i heard his voice speaking to another almost like his. I could not make out what they were saying but after some time, came the sound of the front door opening and closing. I had just finished saying my du'a and was folding the mat when i heard a salam at my door. I instinctively  answered  it. When i turned around  in the direction of the door, i could not see him as his form was instructed by the thick curtains he stood behind. He informed me that lunch was in the kitchen and that he'll be stepping out for a while. I wished him a safe return my tone coming off rather flat. I heard his steps retracting. Sitting on the edge of the bed, i stared into space.

*
After maghrib, came a repetitive soft knock on the front door. I covered the Qur'an i was reading from and stood up to answer the door. It must be him, i thought. Instead, i saw a very cheerful guy probably few years older than i am. This guy isn't him, my inner self concluded.

"Where are my manners? You obviously won't let strangers in. I am Amin. Ya Ahmad's brother. Why is he allowing the amarya to get the door?"

He said in a playful manner. I apologized and let him in with a smile. When he sat down, we exchanged  pleasantries and i offered to get him a drink (not that i knew where the kitchen is). He declined saying he had brought us supper. I was saved. I took the basket from him and kept it on the centre table before sitting back down. He asked where his brother went that he left me all by myself and that Hajiya would definitely hear about his unacceptable behavior. I smiled and told him that he left some few minutes ago to get something important. Amin left shortly afterwards and i locked the door behind him. I stood by the door for a few seconds taking in the view of the living room. The decor is impressive. Very beautiful and classy. I took the basket and went round the house opening every door i come across and appreciating the decor till i finally found the kitchen. The whole house shouts vintage. More like something out of an international style magazine. I can get used to this place, i smiled to myself then muttered an Alhamdulillah.

*
It's way past nine and he is still not back, which got me a bit worried. I went back to the kitchen and checked the cabinets for air tight storage containers which i found. After packing both the lunch and supper in the containers, i stowed them away. That was a lot of food and it got me wondering if Hajiya thinks we have the appetite of elephants. I smiled at that and cleaned the dishes. My mind drifted back to him and that made me even more worried. I wiped the kitchen top and switched off the lights then closed the door behind me. I made my way to my room but my heart almost leapt out of it's ribcage when i almost bumped into a figure in the corridor.

Innalillahi wa inna ilahi raji'un!...Oh i am so sorry i didn't know you came back...Should i warm supper for you or fix something else?

I looked at him and he stared a second longer before telling me he was satisfied and that i should go to bed. He passed by me and opened the door just by my right then uttered a goodnight before closing it behind him. I stood a while longer as tears threatened to spill. At last, i proceeded to my room.

Ruqayyah's POV, how was it?
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