Heart Broken (Unedited)

Chapter Seven

"There's no measuring and weighing in matters of the heart"

Ahmad

8 years ago, there was nothing i wanted more than to set my eyes on her. I wanted to thank her for making me the happiest man alive. But my friends were running late and i did not want to call them else i'll be perceived as the impatient groom, something they'll hold on to and tease me by endlessly. My phone beeped signalling a call. It was a call from my best friend. I smiled because his call signifies that they are all set and ready to escort me to see my bride. When i came out to meet them, the three of them cheered in approval of my outfit making different remarks on how i've killed it. I grinned and joined them in the car as they kept teasing me all the way to my house. Our new home. Just thinking about our home made my heart swell with content. I can't thank Allah enough.

*
She was covered in a delicately woven white thobe with six of her friends sitting with her. Right there, sitting with her legs crossed on the rug, all covered like a royal and looking all angelic, i felt the urge to hug her tight and never let her go. But no! I couldn't. I had to resist the urge to do that what with all the staring eyes present. I could not take my eyes off of her. I was scrutinizing her all over, oblivious to the negotiations going on between the bridesmaids and the groomsmen. I paid attention to every little movement she made. Every detail of her attire lingering a little more here and there. I looked at her beautifully decorated fingers and mine twitched just wanting to trace the patterns drawn on her hands. Eventually i became aware of my surrounding. Voices felt all so discomforting and i wanted them quiet and gone. My Sakinah does not like too much noise and right now, these people are making a whole lot of it. Drowning her in its discomfort. I whispered to my best friend's ear. I told him to just give the bridesmaids what they wanted so that they could all leave. I've always pondered on the necessity of these negotiations. As culture has it, the negotiation is called sayan baki. The ritual entails the bridesmaids covering the bride, who in turn keeps mute until the groomsmen pay a certain amount before her face is unveiled and she is allowed to speak. Only after that, the newly married couple are left alone.

Few minutes passed by before they all left making silly remarks and wishing us a happy matrimonial life. Finally!

*
I sat minutes longer just staring at her. My Sakinah. My angel wife. I scooted closer to her, whispered a Bismillahi  rahman ar rahim before reaching for the edge of her thobe and slowly lifted it off her face. She slowly raised her face to meet my gaze. I was instantly blown away.

Sakinah! I breathed.

That smile. Oh God that smile. The makeup...speechless. I really couldn't take my eyes off of her. I gently reached out and took her hands in mine then helped her up and led her to our bedroom. There we made wudhu and i led her in prayer as is  prescribed by the sunnah. I kept saying Alhamdulillah, thanking Allah for making her mine. That day, that night, was a memorable one.

Present day

I slowly rest my head on the pillow as i felt a growing headache. I wish it's Sakinah in the next room and not another person. Are all women this heartless? I loved her more than i have ever loved anyone and i showed her that i did. The promises she made, all the plans we made. Why wasn't she a little bit patient? Why did she have to leave me like that and not even look back? If only she had held on a bit tighter, a bit longer. If only she felt the love she claimed to have felt. Maybe, just maybe we would have been together right now. Very exhausted from the day's event and trying desperately to lull our baby to sleep so as to get some rest too. A short laugh escaped my lips. A very painful one too. I switched my thoughts to her. Rahimah...no Ruqayyah! Yes i am sure that is the name that was mentioned at the nikah ceremony. I reminisced the incident at the corridor, then this morning before her entourage left. The poor girl. So young and innocent. So scared. So naive. But i know better than to let my guard down and be deceived by a woman's innocence or naivety. A woman is a woman. If the woman  i knew, no scratch that, loved for years and whom also loved me could rip my heart and trample it. What then would be the outcome of trusting another whose marriage to me was arranged?.

Ruqayyah

I tried blinking away the tears but no, i couldn't. I flooped on the bed and cried to my heart's content. I sat up, wiped the tears with the back of my hand and made my way to the bathroom to make wudhu. I read the Qur'an for a while after which i felt relaxed and at ease. Tonight is the first i am spending away from my family. It feels weird. So lonely without Adda Asma' who always challenges me to a game of scrabble or tell me about her day before we go to bed. Here, it is quiet with only the sound of insects to keep me company. I kept tossing and turning in bed wishing this marriage thing is all a dream and that i'll wake up the next day to the voice of Adda Asma' waking me up for subh prayer. If only.

*
To my disappointment, i awoke to find myself in the same room as the day before. It wasn't a dream afterall. Looking at the clock, i scrambled out of bed. I can't believe i slept past subh time. I'll have to tell Adda Asma' to be waking me up or better still set an alarm. Talking of alarms, where did i keep my phone anyway. I stood up and searched for my phone. It's been off ever since i set foot out of home. After switching it on, i got a lot of message notifications. Many of those from former class mates, a few from unknown numbers, one from mama, another from Adda Asma' and the last from Yaya Ibrahim. I sat down to reply the messages which majority are marriage well wishes.

From mama:Your Aunties came back and said you've been crying.Do not cry last born for you have become a grown up now.Remain prayerful and obedient. May Allah bless you and your marriage.

Me:Ameen Mama,i miss you already.

I sniffed away a tear. I miss my mama. I shall call her later in the day.

From Yaya Ibrahim:Sister amarya!😜 hope you like your new home.Do not ditch me for him.Call me everyday.I love you❤
Ps:tell me to come kick his ass anytime (sis thief kawai😠)

Me:i sure will,you know i'm not one to disappoint.Shoot him instead...lol...luv u more bro😘❤miss u😩

Oh brother, how i miss you. I sniffed.

Adda Asma:marriage is the 💣.It's jst been two days & am looooving it.How is yours? ...Oh and KT?...have to visit soon. Say hi to hubby.Oh and pls grow up!
Kisses💏

Me:Yeah yeah ofcourse!...remind me when you grow up then...miss u!

Adda Asma' though, i smiled. I kept the phone on the bedside drawer and made the bed. I should take my bath and fix breakfast, i have someone to feed. Yeah yeah, i rolled my eyes and proceeded to do my business.

This chapter is a bit long.Likes,votes and comments will be appreciated.Thank you lovelies.Do enjoy!
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