Jordan
"I'm not mad at you, Assyria. I promise I'm not." I said as I watched her cry in her hands. I sighed before gently pulling her hands away from her face. "Assyria I'm not mad at you." I repeated, wiping her tears away.
"Then how come you aren't coming home for a long time?" She asked, gazing into my eyes. "Because I made a mistake, and now I have to suffer the consequences." I said.
"But I want you to come home so we can watch cartoons and play tea party all day. Can you come back for my birthday?" She asked and I sighed, realizing her birthday was coming up and for the first time, I wasn't going to be there. I pulled her onto my lap as I thought about how I was going to say this.
"I can't baby. I have to stay here." I said, causing tears to well up in her eyes. I hated to see her cry, it breaks my heart but I had to be honest with her because if I wasn't she would have her hopes up for no reason. "Don't cry. You're gon make me cry too." I said.
Assyria laid her head against my chest and hugged me tightly like she was afraid to let go. "I'm gonna miss you so much" she mumbled and I looked up once I heard sniffling to see Timmy wiping his eyes and my mother full out crying. "Imma miss you more my baby." I responded.
I only had a few minutes left and I still hadn't gotten to speak to Timmy. "Mama, can you take her to get some chips or something?" I asked and my mother nodded as she got up from the seat across from me and took a hold of Assyria's hand, leading her to the vending machines.
"You look better from the last time I saw you." He said and I looked at my daughter as she pointed to what she wanted. "I've been trying not to stress as much." I said after a minute of silence.
When I looked at him, he looked down at the table and that's when I noticed a tear fall from his eyes. I stared at him, not knowing what to say or do. "This my fault. If I never would've got caught up gambling and shit you would be home." He said, finally looking up at me. "Why you do it? When you could've just let me suffer the consequences." He added.
"Because you asked me to little brother. If I would've left you to handle it yourself you'd be dead." I explained. "Probably would've got shot a couple times but not dead." He says with a smirk.
"Yeah, whatever." I said. "How's Johanna?"
"The same." He said. "She lowkey misses you but she's trying to act like she doesn't. She'll come and visit eventually." Timmy added and I nodded, already knowing she was at home probably fucking somebody to get over her feelings for me but I don't see it happening anytime soon.
Me and Johanna started messing around a while back, but it wasn't serious. At least that's what I thought. She wanted me to herself but I was too busy chasing Domonique at the time.
"Tell her that I love her, and to stop being a bitch and come visit me so I can talk to her cute ass." I said, smirking to myself because she really is my lil baby. She's always been there for me and vice versa.
"I got you." He said and I averted my gaze to Assyria as my mother tied her shoes up. My mother said something to Assyria that made her smile. According to Domonique, she had been down since I left and it made me feel bad.
I noticed people around me start to hug so I figured visitation hours were coming to an end. "Ight brother. Be safe," I say as I dapped Timmy up. "Love you." He mumbled before stepping back so I could hug my mother.
"Be good, Jordan." She said as she let go of me and cupped my face. "I love you ma" I say to her and she smiled. "I love you too." She responded. I looked down at Assyria as she stood there with a sad expression on her face.
I squatted down so we were eye to eye, and pulled her into me, hugging her tightly. "I love you, mamas." I said. "I love you more." She mumbled, letting go of me. Her eyes were starting to water and I had to look away to keep from crying myself. "I'll see you soon." I said, watching her grab Timmy's hand, wanting to leave.
She was full out crying and Timmy had lifted her up, letting her cry on his shoulder.
I wiped my eyes before the tears could fall and sat back down in the chair, frustrated with myself for making bad decisions.
***
Domonique
"Damn she said it just like that?" Jada asked after I had finished telling her about the conversation me and Jordan had. "Yeah." I responded, thinking about how serious she was.
I moved the duffle bag full of cash to the side, deciding to take a break from counting it. "You still love her, don't you?" She asked, and I nodded not even bothering to lie about it like I normally would. Hell, I was up late counting all of the money she had stored in the closet. I remembered her telling me something about putting it in a bank account for Assyria and Noah.
"We argue a lot, but that's my fucking nigga and she's not going anywhere." I stated. That was the truth. We tried to stop fucking with each other but we always end up back together.
"Wassup baby?" Jay says, leaning down to kiss my lips and I looked at Jada, wondering when Jay even walked in and if she heard our conversation.
"Well, it's getting late and I think I'm just gon go." Jada said, hugging me. "Text me when you get home," I said once we pulled away from each other.
I got up from the couch and stretched while Jay stared at me with frustration in her eyes. "So you went to go and visit Jordan after I told you ion want you communicating with her?" Jay snapped and I stared at her, becoming annoyed. "This the part where you tell me why you went." She said.
"I don't have to tell you a damn thing." I said, brushing past her but she grabbed my forearm, stopping me from going anywhere. "I asked you a question so answer me before shit get hectic." She said, calmly and I just had to laugh at that.
"Jay, your pussy ass ain't gon do shit. Let yourself out and don't come back. We're through." I said, snatching out of her grip. We stared at each other a little while longer before she backed away and left just like I thought she would.
Had I said that to Jordan, she would've got offended and said something back. Then we'd argue all night and I'd cry because she would threaten to leave. Jordan was the only one that knew how to put me in my place, and she had no problem doing it.
It had only been a few weeks since she's been gone and I'm already missing her like crazy.
