Love, Rameng (Completed)

Menggay

I would like to say that our life together is a fairy tale. But real life is layered and so much more nuanced.

The next night after our wedding, RJ's Papa has a heart attack. We rush him to the hospital and the doctors save his life.

We postpone our honeymoon.

When Papa is healthy enough, we all go back to Manila.

RJ and I live with his parents. He works in his job as I continue my education.

RJ requests the company to delay his posting abroad. His colleagues leave while he stays on in Manila.

I start working on my pre-thesis work and dabble in jewelry design. 

I am grateful for the little blessings granted each day:

- a sale from my IG account

- the kindness of my in-laws

- my husband's enduring love

I get pregnant. On the third month, the doctor says it's a blighted ovum. The baby doesn't develop and I  get an operation.

I cry and cry and cry for days on end.

One time, as I belatedly open our wedding gifts, I chance upon a book with a hokey title, Espresso for the Woman's Spirit.

It has stories of women with the same experience.

I stop crying.

I dream about that baby. She has my eyes and complexion. On her left cheek is a very deep dimple. She smiles at me as she waves goodbye.