This isn't what I want

chapter 13

** JJ's thoughts **

I can see the lights. They're too bright. I can't turn them down. I can't do anything.

I can sense people walking around me, but I can't move my head. I can't see anything. I'm too tired, my eyes are too heavy. My eyelids shut.

I feel like I'm drifting away. I don't feel any pain, but all around me the lights get brighter.

** Dr Aisha Walker's POV **

"She needs 5mg of Sevoflurane now. We're going into surgery."

One of my team prepares the injection but then stops.

"Aisha, I can't find a vein."

"What?"

"I can't find one."

The machine starts flashing red.

"Blood pressure's crashing. We've got a bleed somewhere."

"We need to open her now." I say urgently.

"But we don't know where it is."

"We'll have to find it. Now. Or she and her baby won't make it."

** Will's POV **

As I sit in the back of the van, Aidan watches me closely.

"Why did you do what you do to the prostitutes?"

"They're a stain on the earth. They do nothing. They beg for sex. It's disgusting. But it doesn't come close to what you've done to your wife."

"What do you mean?"

"You abused your own wife for two years. And then you stab her? That's sick. At least get someone else to do it."

"You think I shouldn't have done it?"

"No. I don't deny that your wife needs sorting out. But I could never do it to my own wife. Someone I know, someone I can relate to. Someone I might, or used to have feelings for. Don't you feel anything?"

"I do. But I have to do it. She needs punishing for her disrespect. She needs to understand."

"I'm sure she does."

"Why take her to hospital?"

"Well, if she died straight away, there's no fun. She needs to feel it enough. You need to make an impression."

"Oh, don't you worry, Aidan. I will."

** Reid's POV **

Pregnant? Will's baby?

"Hey, kiddo, what's up?"

My face crumples and I sob into Rossi's shoulder.

"Jaydge was pregnant. With Will's child."

"Hey, it's alright. How is she? Was she on the phone?"

I take a deep breath and continue.

"No that was Dr Aisha Walker from North Richmond Hospital, someone took her to the hospital. She had a stab wound in her abdomen. I don't know what I'm going to do."

"Hey, at least we know where she is. Come on, let's go."

"I can't. What if... what if she hasn't made it? She was going into surgery. I don't think I can go. I can't see her like that."

"Reid, its going to be fine. She'll be out of surgery,  we can go see her. You can talk to her."

I think for a moment and wipe my tears away.

"Of course. Let's go."