This isn't what I want

Untitled Part 52

** Four weeks later, Emily's POV **

Finally, JJ's making some progress. The doctors found out what she had been drugged with. Rohypnol, LSD and PCP in varying amounts. But she had some form of herbal drug in her system which made her psychosis more vivid. But the effects of a week's worth of injections are wearing off. Doctors hope she'll be able to recognise us soon.

** JJ's POV **

The doctor smiles as he hands me a small plate of fruit salad and cream. 

"How are you feeling?"

"Better today, thank you doctor."

"That's good. Can you remember anything more about the past few weeks?"

I close my eyes and concentrate hard.

"I can see him, Peter. He's carrying some syringe as he approaches me. He's saying something to me. He's, he's getting closer. He's touching me."

I open my eyes and I realise I'm breathing a lot faster. The doctor just sits opposite me on the edge of the bed.

"It's alright. You're getting there. It's slowly coming back. And what about the dreams? Are they still occurring?"

"Only a few times. But they vary. Sometimes it's about Peter. Sometimes it's about Will. Sometimes it's just about me."

"The dreams will go away soon. It does get easier." He says and gently, although awkwardly, pats my leg. 

I know he does that every morning on purpose. I still flinch, but I know he isn't trying to hurt me. It's just natural. I've grown to like this doctor. His name is Doctor Grayson. George Grayson. He's 31, single, no previous relationships. He's got light curly hair and a wide smile. Something about him is just so calming, and comforting. I like him being around me, but only him. He seems to understand, as he does all the tests and stuff, not letting other nurses in to my room. 

"Hey, I'm sorry I'm so messed up." I apologise as he stands up.

I reach out and, after a pause, I grab his hand. It's soft, and warm. He turns to face me again and bends down to my level.

"Jennifer, none of this is your fault. You didn't deserve any of this to happen."

"Thank you." I whisper as he gets up and slips out of the door.

The fruit salad is delicious and refreshing, and after I finish, I lean back against my pillows. I close my eyes, and I get a sudden flashback.

The doorbell rang, and for some reason I' was nervous as I went to open the door. He stood on my front doorstep with a small bunch of pink roses, my favourite, and a book with a ribbon. My worries immediately faded away as I leant in to his hug and he kissed my forehead.

"Hi, you're beautiful." He said lovingly, and handed me the flowers.

"Wow, Spence, they're gorgeous. How did you know they're my favourite?" I asked him as I smelt the roses.

"I have my sources." He answered mysteriously. "Shall we?" He asked and offered me his arm.

I slipped my hand around his arm and he led me to his car. I was so excited I almost dropped the flowers in a hurry to open the door, but he was already one step ahead of me, and he opened the door neatly ready for me to slip in to the passenger seat.

"After you, ma'am." He said politely, and I laughed as I climbed inside.

When we got going, I looked over to look at him, and I could see the love in his eyes as he smiled at me. I was so happy that we were finally going out.

Spence... Spencer.

"Spencer? Spencer Reid." I suddenly realise who I've been thinking about.

Spencer Reid, the love of my life.