Hard Time (Hard Time Series Book 1)

Mother's From Inside

Family day had been good and bad to say the least for when it was time for the kids to leave most of the women entered a state of mild depression.  Stef herself after these visit wasn't seen for days and would be in the absolute worst mood and the girls in the Den avoided her.  Lena herself was ok but it had been just as heartbreaking saying goodbye to Noah especially since they spent the most time together that they had in almost a year. Shit had it been almost a year since she had landed in Chowchilla? Almost as she was back in the library putting away some of the books and most certainly missing Callie's presence. Everyone missed her presence especially Stef who was having the hardest time. Most nights she felt the blonde toss and turn saying the girls name in her sleep and Lena could only hold and comfort her. Calls to the hospital were not even possible and the women relied on one of the guards for information. Same with Tracey who was still in stable condition but doing better. The lack of contact made Stef insane for she just wanted to make sure her girls were ok and her granddaughter but pretty soon she would gain access to a cell phone from the Latina Queens and from a deal Lena would make.  The blonde was just grateful that her grandaughter was doing well and Lena was anxiously waiting to see a photo even if she knew baby Stef was beautiful.

As the slim woman took out a few children's books and put them to the side she could only reflect on the visit with her father which was almost a week ago and his concerns toward her life and her future life with Stef. Yes she was different, yes she had done things she never would before, but they were things that needed to be done for the safety of her family inside, her wife and herself. That was something she could never really explain to her parents and it was that same side of Stef she didn't understand in the beginning.  The side she use to question, the side she didn't like in the beginning but a side she had now as well. A side that forced her to harm someone, to hurt someone and to kill someone for her and Stef were just alike now and there was no going back. Would like be difficult when they got out like her father said. Yes but the two were willing to make it work no matter what the odds were against them because they certainly were. They would face extreme challenges of finding jobs, a place to live while trying to get their parental rights reinstated. Maybe it would be easier for Lena and Callie but Stef was another issue altogether. 

Meeting her wife's children that day had been bittersweet for she didn't get to speak much with Jude for Stef had been trying hard to get through to him. Lena understood and knew the young boy was having a very hard time based on his past, his mother being locked up and trying to take his life recently. None of that was easy to say the least as Lena had remained at the benches with Frankie and Noah coloring with the young girl who was just as sweet as she imagined.

FLASHBACK

"Do you want to draw this picture together sweetheart? Maybe you can show Noah?" Lena said to the little girl who was very quiet and could see she was looking around for her mother. "It's ok honey your mama will be back she just needs to talk to Jude a bit."

"Is he in trouble?" she asked quietly.

"No baby. He's not. She just wants to make sure he is ok and then she will come back and maybe you guys can do one of the races."

"I want my mama." Seeing tears fall from her eyes Lena gently wiped them as Noah handed Frankie a crayon.

"Crayon, crayon." He said to her as the little girl glanced to him and gently took it.

"Thank you." she sniffled.

"Do you want to color with us honey? Maybe you can color a picture for your mama. I'm sure she would love it baby."

"And then she will be back?"

"Yes honey. She will be back. She will I promise."

Handing her a piece of paper Frankie sadly took it from Lena as she watched her draw a flower. In her eyes Stef's little girl was so sensitive and loved her wife so much that  it was heartbreaking. What was also heartbreaking and sweet at the same time was watching her show Noah how to hold the crayon.