fall | baekhyun

T E N

Pain. Sore. Bruises. Stings.

All in one came to me everytime I moved around even a little.

The fragile me was a hopeless case. I felt so dirty, so unwanted. Maybe all of the feelings that had been felt by a girl who was being forced to be a slut were there in me.

Being raped by my own husband? Such an embarrassing thing to be revealed to the world.

I had no one to be my ears.
I had no one to pat me and say that it doesn't even matter.

I was too desperate to let go of my anger, my series of torture that had been bottled up in every cell of my body.

I crawled to the small room at the end of the hallway. Brought along a bag of water and chocs that I hid well inside my closet for weeks. Ignoring the screaming parts of my limbs that told me to stop moving.

I was in a vain and you were nowhere near for me to reflect the hurtful feelings.

I cried in silence as my fingers dancing; working their own so-called-magic on the white canvas.

I lost in my own world while my imagination ran wild with you as my inspiration of the day.

Hours passed and the used to be plain canvas wasn't looking too ordinary anymore.

There was a naked girl with injured body spooning on a bed. Her face was wet with tears of agony. Totally perfect.

And I smiled a genuine smile.

Yes. I expressed myself with arts.

Arts that people like you won't ever understand.. and you never will understand it with that cold heart of yours, Byun Baekhyun.