An Outlet: Part 5

1 January, 2019.

Ah! A new year is upon us! I feel scared but slightly optimistic about this year because I have a feeling (or almost certain) that my life in going to undergo a major change this year.

I ended 2018 on a high note and that continued on the first day of 2019 as well. Amanda and I danced quite a lot and kinda went crazy until it was time to turn off the music for the betterment of those who wanted to sleep. Alex, Amanda and I spoke for a while after which we went on to do our own thing.

What I decided to do was catch up on the all the content that I had yet not seen/heard. Not everything I caught up with was happy, hunky and dory but I feel like I started the New Year on the right note.

The first thing I read was Jin's first message of 2019. BTS have for sometime now openly spoken about the difficult time they had in 2018. Jin, in this message, spoke about how inspite of their efforts, the fan wars, hate and criticism got to them and affected them to a point where they felt the need to disconnect from the internet. As prominent personalities, it's difficult for him to even admit that things affect him because they are expected to "suck it up because they chose to be in the limelight". The sad part is, howmuchever you try, you can't change this mindset very easily.

According to me, BTS have been doing a good job with showing their bright side atleast when they are in front of the lens. Jin is the one of the most positive people I have come across and I would just ask him and all the other members to hang in there. You have and will get a lot of love from so many different people. Just like what you said in your message, try to focus on the ones who give you strength and realise your value. Because, let me tell you, that number is HUGE! :D

I heard IZ*ONE's new Japanese song! They performed a small version of it on a Japanese show even though it isn't officially released yet. To be completely honest, I'm a liiiiiitle underwhelmed by the song. It shall grow on me tho. I guess I'll wait for the music video. The dance is good so that's a plus. I don't know if Japanese music is my taste but I did kinda like 'No Way Man' and may be one or two other AKB songs so I don't know.

Oh now coming to something I had put on hold for quite some time- RM's releases. He released his playlist called 'Mono' a little more than 2 months ago but I wanted to listen to it only when I was in a clear headspace.

Tokyo's music is very peaceful. I absolutely loved the pre-chorus melody! Seoul is totally a(n early) morning song. And I loved whole song, especially the chorus! RM's voice sounds so good! I like the music arrangement of Moonchild. The rap flow as well are the lyric video are quite dope! Badbye has a very mysterious/mystical feel to it which was good. Uhgood seemed to have a sad undertone to the song (which may have also come from the repeated use of the word 'lonely') but for some reason, I found it very comforting. I think RM tried to play around with some vocals for Everything Goes and it worked. This was kind of like an uplifting song while still keeping the calm vibe of the entire playlist.

RM's Mono on the whole had a very chill vibe, borderline sad (I've heard that some of the lyrics do touch upon some sad aspects of self) but very smoothing to the ears. RM sure knows what he is doing and he's doing a great job. Thank you for your work RM.

My favourite song from the playlist has to be Seoul. It's definitely the type of song I'd listen to quiiiite a lot of times. A proper mix of up-beat and peacefulness.

I haven't read the lyrics yet and but with what I've heard, I just might love the songs even more once I do read the lyrics.

After RM's wonderful work, I heard an original song from yet another BTS member. Promise is Jimin's first time releasing a self composed song and if it is the same song he spoke to RM about in one of the Bon Voyage episodes, I'm glad that finally did complete the song and had courage enough to share it with us. For Promise is very beautiful! Jimin you did so well!

I listened to all this good music and went to sleep eventually.

Before I continue my day, I want to list down my resolutions for the year 2019.

1] Find my passion- In 2016, my main goal was to go out of my comfort zone. In 2017, my main goal was to socialize and be considered at an important team member and in 2018, my main goal was to focus and build on my career.

This year my main goal is to find my passion. What is it that excites me to no end and I'm never tired to do it? Plus that thing should be able to earn me some money as well. So yeah, that's my main goal for 2019.

2] Read loads of physical books again- I was never an avid reader but I would read books here and there and genuinely enjoyed them. For some reason I stopped reading last year but this year I want to get back into the whole reading culture. I want to cover classics as well as move towards non conventional books.

3] Stay away from gadgets- This is a very difficult resolution and frankly, is a permanent resolution which never gets accomplished. Having said that, I'll continue my efforts.

4] Be good at Mental Math- This might come across as a bit wierd but I really want to good at mental math. As a Finance aspirant, I think that's one thing that will make me feel a bit better about my capabilities.

5] Efficiently Manage Day Time- Even though my routine might change in a few months, I want to be able to make good use of my morning time, the time before I leave for college. Things will be much better for me if I end up being successful in this.

6] Indulge heavily into personal care- I guess this was one of my resolutions last year as well and I did succeed for a couple of months until winter began. I need to get back into that healthy routine again.

7] Get 75 up percentage in my finals- I need to put that much efforts to get that desired results. This year I really need to.

8] Invest savings- Honestly, it's high time I start doing this now. I don't want to waste more years anymore.

9] Up my general knowledge game- Along with mental math, I want to be a person who has a lot of insights and is knowledgeable, something that I know for sure that I lack in.

10] Excercise + drink more water- I want to indulge in physical activities like excercise, dance, etc. on a daily basis. This has again been a resolution for more than 1 year but I'm still going to try.

11] Create more than consume on a daily basis- Ironically, I heard this in a YouTube video. Last year I feel like I spent quite a lot of time seeing what the others have done instead of living my own life.  This includes KPop IDOLs and other YouTubers. I need to be able to do something in my actual life, more than watching others'.

I woke up at almost 12PM, good first day I must say. Lol. We pretty much lazed around, took a bath, ate food, saw childhood albums, greeted my cousins brother (who is a chef at a big hotel which is why he is rarely ever at home), got packed and left for home.

We came back home to our tired parents sleeping. In the evening, I unpacked my bag, put loads of clothes for washing, self washed certain clothes, took off all the dried clothes, folded them and put them in place.

Mom wasn't feeling well today so she went off to sleep very early but Dad, Alex and i watched this movie called 'Dangal'. Nice movie.

Run BTS! EPISODES ARE BACKKKKKK! The first episode came out today and you bet I watched it. I'm so happy!