An Outlet: Part 5

8 November, 2018.

The first half of my day went more or less the way it has been these past few days. Don't know if that's a good thing or not.

So I saw the full Music Video for BTS' Airplane Pt.2 and yep, it's really good. To be honest, I wasn't a big fan of the song when I first heard it but it grew on me once they started performing it during their promotions. And the vibe of the video totally matches the song. It's nothing crazy, just a bunch of good looking guys in and around a Latina bar wearing latina clothes and feeling the beat. I like that they kept the choreography intact. JHope's freestyle on the bar table top was damn cool.

IZ*ONE got their first winnnnnn! Woahhhh! It's just been 11 days since their debut! Congratulations!

In the evening, I watched 2 more F.R.I.E.N.D.S episodes with Alex. We're nearing rapidly towards the end. After that, I started filling my (physical) travel journal that I had been putting off for a while now. I want to get it done before my next trip which is at the end of this month. I'm excited for it!

I made a different type of rangoli today. I wasn't exactly tired of making one but definitely felt like putting a little less effort after 4 consecutive days of putting out different ones. So since today is the Padwa (New Year's day for some people) day of Diwali, I decided to write that with rangoli colours with an assortment of diyas and other decorative items placed beneath it. It didn't look as good as I expected but atleast I tried. And thankfully we have new wicks now so the candles stayed lit.

After that, I got ready for dinner. Every year, it's kind of like a tradition in my family to go out for a fancy dinner during one of the Diwali days. This year, we decided to go for an unlimited barbecue place. We reached on time and went up to our reserved seat. The place did look fancy. And oh the food was AMAZING! On the grill, we ate some paneer, whole mushrooms, Mediterranean chicken, mutton sheek kebab, fish and PRAWNS! Dude everything was was tasty but those smokey prawns were fucking delicious. I'm pretty sure I ate around 10-12 of those.

I was more than half full by the time we decided to stop the barbecue and shift to the main course. I mean, since this is an unlimited barbecue place, your meal is bound to be more of the starters than anything else. Anyway, I had some garlic noodles and fish gravy and it was good. In the end I had some deserts like brownie, mousse, gulab jamun (a milk solid based hot sweet dish) and cake. There was a kulfi guy as well but I just went and asked him to give me some tutti fruity which originally was supposed to be a decorative item for that kulfi lol.

Yeah, that was my obviously wholesome dinner for today. Fuck dude, I'm never going to be thin again. T•T (that's supposed to be a crying face).

Have I ever mentioned how tedious it is to keep in touch with people? For quite some months now I had stopped chatting with everyone. I literally had only Kristen on my frequently contacted list and we didn't even chat that frequently. Yes, I do have some active group chats but I'm not a group chat kind of a person. Well, turns out I'm not even a personal chats kind of a person either.

So while on my way to dinner today, I felt the need to finally wish Happy Diwali to people instead of continuing to ignore humanity. And I did that. Only, I messaged quite a fucking huge number of people. They were people who I consider to be a liiiiiitle bit more than acquaintainces (the 'liiiiiitle bit' was because I was quite close to some of these people or used to frequently stay in touch with some of them at some point in my life but it hasn't been the case lately). These included 4-5 childhood friends from both the buildings I've ever stayed in, a bunch of my school friends, a person I met in my personality development class that I had taken before entering college, some junior college friends, tuition classes friends, senior college friends, Alex's robot friend, Emily and Paloma's mothers, some college professors as well as my office collegues and 2 of the writers I worked with during my internship. Fuck, that is a loooooot of people.

After dinner, when I was on my way back home, I had messages from 35 different chats! And that's not even all the people I messaged! Ofcourse there were some who had just wished me back but there were quite some people wanting to start a conversation. Yes, that's exactly what my intention was but I chickened out man. I again ignored all those people for today. It's really difficult to go from not chatting at all to trying to chat with so many people. I'll reply to them tomorrow I swear.

Ahhhh I just I hope I don't blow this and am able to keep up a conversation with people again. I really need to up my game... and motivation levels.